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Hello, everyone. Y'all come on in.

By the way, if you're newer to me, I am Corinne. So I do this call once a month just as a way to make sure that anybody who is either on my email list or if you are listening to my free podcast, losing one hundred with Corinne, which if you are not listening to, you should be losing one hundred pounds with Corinne, and you should be sharing it with your friends. Because I feel like sometimes I'm the only motherfucking person in the world who is trying to help women lose weight, especially women over forty lose weight in a way that's fucking sane. Like, everything out there is full of restriction, and it's full of taking away food you love. Like, no one's addressing our real problems. Like, they want us to do diets that are exhausting and hard, and they take a lot of time, and they take us away from our family, and they make us you know, have to eat separate from our family. It's so much isolation, and it feels like punishment.

And the problem is is we're already busy people. We already have a lot going on, and we are already exhausted and tired. If it ain't our hormones, it's our life. If it ain't our life, it's our job. It's like just think about the typical plate of a forty plus year old woman. It's overfilled.

And I'm not even talking about our food plate. I'm talking about our life plate.

And when it's overfilled and you put on top a diet that is, like, requiring you to do five thousand bullshit things, you're not gonna be able to last. And that ain't because something's wrong with you. It's because the diet shouldn't have to be like that. Like, to lose weight, it just should not be that complicated.

Losing weight is literally common sense shit. It's how I lost a hundred pounds, and it's all I teach. Common sense things that are gonna get our weight off. So let's go to our questions.

And the first one is very holiday specific. So it is, is it better to make a holiday protocol and use it for holiday dinners and luncheons and accept the five pound gain for the month, or should I continue with my original plan, which was to lose weight during the holidays and get under two hundred before the New Year starts? So let me say this first. A protocol is very simple.

It's something that I teach. If you go back through all of my podcasts, you will be able to find a podcast that will say something about protocol. Just listen to that if you want a longer, more detailed explanation. The short version is is a protocol a holiday protocol is literally where I'm thinking through something that's coming up, and I wanna give myself some guidelines so that I'm not just walking up into this situation free balling, just hoping for the best.

I tell people all the time, hope ain't a plan. Hope ain't a strategy. We are not gonna lose weight by hoping. We're gonna lose weight by thinking.

You need to think through things ahead of time. So one of my main principles when it comes to losing weight, especially during the holidays, is we gotta think before we eat. Sometimes thinking before we eat means we're gonna think about it before we put it in our mouth. Now this is water, but pretend this is a smoothie.

So we're gonna think before we eat. Sometimes we're going to think way in advance. So I'm gonna be looking at all my holidays and all of my parties, and I'm going to think about what would really help me lose weight, but also make things easy and not deprive me and make me enjoy things. That's all a protocol is.

It's where you think ahead of time. So in this question, she says, is it better to make a holiday protocol? Abso fucking lutely. Why would you not?

And for some reason, this person thinks that if I make a holiday protocol where I'm gonna think before I eat, make choices that will help me lose weight and let me enjoy foods that I love, give me some things to do when there's a food pusher, and I don't really wanna eat those things. When I think through all my problems and I put it down on a one pager of, like, and this is how we're gonna roll. These are the things I'm gonna think. These are the things I'm gonna do.

These are the things I'm gonna say. Here's the things I definitely wanna eat. Here's things I definitely don't wanna eat. But in the past, it's been jackass eating that did make me gain weight during the holidays.

When you think before you eat, should be able to lose weight.

Making a protocol with foods you like is not gonna slow you down. Not making a protocol is gonna slow you down.

And then the other thing is is, like, continue with my original plan to lose weight to get under two hundred before the New Year. Your original plan, it sounds very much like you've just given yourself two choices in this situation. I either make a protocol, and for some reason, you've got that tied to it's gonna have foods I love on it, so there's I'll just have to gain weight. You only gain weight if you overeat.

Y'all stop thinking that there are certain foods that make you gain weight. There's not one person who's overweight because they ate cookies. Now there's a lot of people in this world who are overweight because they eat cookies when they're tired, when they're mad, when they're upset, when they're stressed, when they're bored, when they're lonely, when somebody gives them some because they don't want to waste their money because it's the only time of year I get this cookie. Like, we eat cookies for a lot of reasons, and we'll eat too many cookies for reasons that are laced in bullshit.

It ain't the cookie's damn fault.

It's our thinking that's doing it. So stop thinking that there are certain foods that make you break out in fat. We are not allergic to foods, and they somehow turn into fat cells on our bodies. That is not happening.

So she's put herself in a situation where she only gives herself two choices. I eat foods alike on a protocol or eat in a way that I hate and lose weight.

There's a middle. You cannot lose weight if the only way that you're gonna do it is through it's either balls out or in my face, eating it all the time. Like like, I'm telling you right now, you can lose weight without suffering.

It is a hundred percent possible when you are cutting out stupid reasons for eating.

Now a lot of our stupid reasons for eating are based in, you know, a lot of emotions, a lot of stress. It's our inability to handle our emotions. It's all that kind of stuff, which I teach plenty of.

But the middle lane is this.

You have the opportunity to make a holiday plan that says, here's what I'm gonna do, and here's what I'm not gonna do.

And here's the things I'm gonna enjoy, and here are the things that what I teach in my program are not worth it.

So I teach a concept inside my program, and all of my members are going through it right now.

It's called VIP Belly.

Your belly is like an exclusive club.

It is the high rollers room, and there's a velvet rope, and there's a bouncer. Your bouncer is your brain, and food is trying to get in the club.

And so some food read the rules.

Dress for success. No jeans. No baggy shit hanging down off your ass. You gotta have good looking clothes.

You need to look like you showered and combed your hair. You gotta be prepared for the club.

Some foods roll up in there like they just rolled out of bed in their pajamas and their Uggs hoping to get into the VIP room.

It ain't happening.

So your job is to say like, my belly is fucking special.

Special shit gets in, and I should be carting at the door, and I should be questioning and looking at what the food wore today to see if it's actually worth it. Are is the food bringing its crazy buddies in that are gonna get drunk and tear the place up?

That's how I want you thinking about it.

So when you think about a protocol, a protocol is gonna weed out things like like, I'm always telling myself, during the holidays, I do not grab ass.

Grab ass means to me, I am not gonna sit there, and just because I walk by something, that means I'm gonna eat it. Just because I'm at Costco and it's a, you know, holiday special M and M and they're handing them out, No.

I don't do that stuff. It's not worth it. That's not club belly.

It's not VIP. It's not worth me waking up on January first full of bloat and regret.

So I make a protocol that says, Corinne, here are the things you gotta watch out for. Here are the things that you mindlessly will do that will add weight, and these are the easy things to cut out because you're not emotionally attached to these. You're just not fucking thinking through things.

A protocol also reinforces, are you gonna eat when you're hungry, or are you just gonna eat because you gave up until January? It's gonna reinforce, are you gonna eat until you've had enough and you've really enjoyed it, or are you gonna stuff yourself to the gills to where you wake up in the morning feeling like ass and your rings don't fit?

A protocol also reinforces water and sleep. You know, during the holidays, you better stay fucking hydrated. You know, if you're like me, the fireplaces are running, you're gonna get dry real quick during the holidays. Last thing you need is to be having yourself some extra cravings all because you're sleep deprived and not drinking your water.

Don't make weight loss harder on yourself than it needs to be.

And then a protocol allows for special meals so that you get to look forward to them and anticipate them and not dread them. And a protocol is gonna let you eat normally all day.

I'm gonna tell y'all right now, skipping fucking meals and going into a special dinner thinking you did yourself a solid is what I call stupid shit.

Tell me the last time you were real hungry, and all of a sudden you're like, and I'm in total control over what I'm gonna put in my mouth. That's my formula. Starve myself. You know what most of y'all tell me? Well, I didn't get to eat much today, and, unfortunately, every time I start eating, it just all goes to shit. Can't control myself, Corinne.

That is the problem. Please, please, please stop starving yourself before you go to a meal. Eat like a normal human being who deserves food all day long. Go in without your body being hijacked, your hormones out of whack, and your brain set loaded like a gun to go, first bite in the mouth.

I'm gonna tell you how you should just eat all the things. You deserve it. You didn't eat much today, and you're gonna feel like you're totally out of control. So protocol allows you to not do stupid shit.

That's all the protocol is gonna do. It's gonna keep you from doing dumb shit all through the holidays so that you can lose some weight. Alright.

The last thing I want y'all to remember is that you can enjoy the holidays.

You can enjoy foods on purpose.

Just think before you eat. Get better at spotting when you are mindlessly eating. Get better at spotting when you're emotionally eating, and try to cut that shit out.

That's how you're gonna lose weight during the holidays. Alright. Let's see.

I am always yo yoing up and down by ten pounds from a healthy weight. Is there a different strategy I'm missing for those of us who are so close to healthy weight? Yeah. You're not working on your emotional eating.

That's what's happening. I promise every single person that I coach in my membership who dicks around with the same fucking five to ten pounds always has the same sad ass story. The second they they start cutting back and doing, like, slightly extreme things to get the scale to go down, and then the second the scale goes down, they go back to emotional eating. They're not solving why.

Like, I want you to think about why did I gain that ten pounds?

Was I eating past enough again?

Was I eating when I wasn't hungry? And if so, why?

Why was I eating past enough? What are the things I tell myself? Why am I not waiting for hunger? What are the things I'm telling myself?

Almost every single woman I know can lose ten to fifty pounds white knuckling and willpower and making themselves do shit, and then when they get to a point to where the weight isn't making them miserable, isn't bothering them, guess what? The reasons why they were eating to begin with now are in their face because they don't have the noise of hating the weight, drowning it out.

That is the big difference.

I guarantee you that if I went through every single person who says I'm dicking around with the same five to ten pounds, I would find mindless eating that comes back, I would find emotional eating.

Because if you're eating more food than you need, there is an emotional reason behind it.

This is just a hundred percent true. Do not snow yourself and do not act like you're not an emotional eater. Every human is an emotional eater.

We're supposed to be emotional eaters. Just some of us are emotionally eating because we can't cope with life, or we can't cope with certain things, or we don't know how to handle ourselves in certain ways, or we get stuck into diet mentality.

Well, I can get ten pounds off because I think I have to do these things, knowing that when you do those things, when you lose the ten, you ain't gonna keep doing them. So here's, like, the other thing that happens.

And this is something that if you also for this person who just talked, if you will go look through the podcast, there is one that talks about dicking around with the same five pounds. Some I know I've recorded one at one point. Go and look through the podcast. I bet you can find it.

Now the other thing that happens very often with people who fuck around like this, you don't like what you do to get there.

You make yourself do things, but you don't fall in love with it. This is the number one reason why women lose weight then gain it back.

The number one. So write it down.

When I'm losing weight, I'm not following in love with the process.

I'm telling myself I have to, I should, this is what I gotta do. Like, when you do the things, you're never thinking about how it's like, you know what? I'm noticing how this is changing my life. You're not reinforcing that this process to lose weight isn't a process to lose weight.

To lose weight, I say this all the time, you gotta lose it like you're gonna wanna live it.

You can't lose it and then figure out how you're going to live it when you get there because the problem is is that when you get to the end, you have zero foundation.

You have no habits. If all you did was make yourself do things, you weren't really forming habits. You were will powering. You were forcing. You were making.

That doesn't your brain loves pleasure. And if you're using force and willpower to lose weight, your brain's not getting pleasure. It's not getting the payoff for a habit.

It is now sitting there thinking, okay. I'm not gonna put this as a habit because she doesn't really like it. So the second that we're done with the reason why we're doing this, I can go back to the old habits, which gave us a lot of pleasure, which we really enjoyed, and I love that lifestyle even if that lifestyle makes you overweight.

So the number one reason why this happens is you need somebody to help you understand how do you lose weight in a way that you're gonna actually fall in love with it. There are steps to do that. There are things you have to tell yourself. There are things you have to do to make sure that happens. Otherwise, you're just making yourself lose weight and leaving it up to chance, a roll of a dice, a coin flip as to if you're gonna be able to keep it off or not.

And I don't like being risky like that, and I don't teach risk.

I teach people, like, this is how we're gonna do it, and these are the things you need to be doing on the way down so that if you think about it, if you fall in love with the process of your weight loss, you really like what you're doing, you find freedom and peace and calm in it. And, like, each and every day, you're thinking about how your life's changing for the better and whatnot, you don't have a reason to go back to anything else at the end.

But I watch people cut out carbs, cut out sugar, fast, do excruciating eight week boot camps and where they're gonna eat chicken and broccoli and do blah blah blah, get shots that they hate, but and stay sick the entire time, but not really like what they're doing. I watch people do this over and over and over again, and then guess what happens at the end?

They regain their weight.

And they do it because they get there, and they don't like the life. They don't wanna keep working that hard.

They don't wanna keep suffering. Who would?

And because you didn't do it the way you wanna live it, you have a reason to go back to that stuff.

When you lose weight the way you wanna live your life, you've given yourself a reason to never go back.

Alright.

I've been a member a few times, and I always quit to go find that next diet that will I will do all the things. I get close to my next goal after getting to Wonderland, and then I sabotage myself. You're not sabotaging yourself. I guarantee you that when you're doing all the things, you're doing what I just talked about. You're will powering. You're making.

You're doing something that you think is all the things.

And then guess what? When this is usually what happens. We don't sabotage ourselves usually. There is a thing called self sabotage, but what I think happens if you wanna alright.

Here's how you're sabotaging yourself. You are on purpose doing shit you know that you will not want to do for the rest of your life. You hope you'll want it. You hope you kinda like it.

You hope you can keep doing it, but you don't want to do it.

I would bet my fucking tits that that is what's happening.

Then what happens is so look like, I know if you're listening to the podcast replay, you can't see this, but I got my hands in front of my face, and they're even.

So when you can't stand your weight, back when I weighed two fifty, I hated myself. I hated my weight. I hated everything that I couldn't do. I was obsessed with how miserable I was. So I was like a level ten of misery.

Misery. Now my fear of losing weight, my not wanting to, my too tired to do it, my excuses, they were like a five.

But when your misery or your bullshit or whatever is a ten, you don't like, a five seems pretty good. All of a sudden, you're like, well, I know I'm afraid I can't lose weight, but I gotta do something because I can't fucking suffer like this no more. We call it hitting rock bottom. We call it our, like, you know, bottoming out.

There's a thousand names for it. Okay. So we get going. We doing our bullshit that we're like, I'm gonna do Sisn't doing so much better than OBS where she's making me work on my mind.

I don't wanna work on my mind. I just wanna get my ass small.

You go running for the hills and you do it.

Well, as you lose weight, your five stays a five.

You're, like, not liking having to cut out sugar and carbs. You're not liking exercising all the time. Plus, over here, we got life shit.

Well, my job sucks, and I hate my commute, and every day I come home, pissed at the world.

My boss is a dick.

I'm a teacher, and this year, my kids are So we're sitting at a five of misery. Well, as you lose weight, guess what? You're not a ten. Now you're nine.

Now you're an eight. Now you're a seven. Now you're a six. Now now we're about even.

The second you get to a four where your weight isn't the biggest problem in the room, this five now becomes a ten. All of a sudden, it's like your life and how much you hate doing that diet and how tired you are, it the volume gets turned up.

And then now that is way louder than I should keep going. I should keep losing weight.

This is working. It's like, no. It's like, now this is the fire in the room. Now this is the emergency.

I've gotta fix this. I can't feel this bad all the time. I'm just gonna like, I just need a weekend off. And then a weekend of binge eating turns into a a like, I try to get my shit back together on Monday, except this time, it's not as easy as the first time because you weren't miserable.

You know what you are this time on Monday? Feeling guilty, forcing yourself to do shit, and knowing that what you're fixing to make yourself do sucks the life out of you. You don't want it anyway.

And so it's real you can't just start back. It's like I get now maybe three, four good days in me. Next thing I know, by Thursday, I'm talking myself into I need a break.

And the next thing know, you're just off the rails.

And usually, we just quit something.

We regain a bunch of weight.

We get we get back to a level ten.

It outweighs all the other misery of our life, and we start again. Here's the big problem.

Not only do you need to do something that makes sense to do for the rest of your life so that there's no reason to escape, but this level five shit that you're ignoring, the reasons why you need to eat, the I need a break from my diet because my week was so hard, my boss was such a jackass, and all these things, and I make all that mean that I don't do a good job and nobody likes me, And then on top of all, you know, all my misery about what's going on, everybody in the world's relying on me, and I gotta take care of them.

Then food comes back in and says, girl, can I just hug you?

Like, I know I'm a donut, but I got arms. I'll take care of you. Let's just go. Let's just eat for a minute. You'll just feel so much better. I mean, you aren't taking care of everybody, and everybody looks to you.

That is how we get into this shit. So if I had to guess, that is exactly what's going on.

And I'm gonna be real honest. If you don't wanna do all the work on solving the problems of your life so you aren't so miserable and you aren't so jacked up with stress and you aren't so pulled in a thousand directions so that you're not getting tempted to eat all the time, then give up the dream of losing weight. And I'm gonna be real honest with all of you.

Stop doing bullshit. If you ain't gonna fix your life while you lose weight, what's the goddamn point?

Who wants to be a size eight, stressed out, anxious, and worried all the time?

Not me.

That's how I that's why I was overweight.

I weighed two fifty because I worried my husband was gonna leave me.

I was two fifty because I didn't like being a mother most of the time, and I had a baby that was high knees. And so then not only did I not enjoy being a mother, but then on top of that, I thought I was broken.

I thought something must be wrong with me.

And then on top of that, I felt guilty for not feeling like everybody else that I thought every mother felt. I thought I was the lonely one, the isolated one, the the weird one. And so I ate my face off every night because all day long, I was just trying to take care of a child while listening to shit in my brain all day.

And I guarantee you, when I lost weight, one of the things I knew was I didn't wanna be a size eight and feeling like that.

I wanna be a size eight who said who figured out, I now know how to talk to myself.

I now know how to reason with myself. I now know how to not wear myself out. I now know how to not stress over things that aren't meant to be stressed over. I now know how to not worry all the time over shit that really doesn't need to be worried about. I broke those habits that made me eat my face off.

And when all that happened, not only did I lose weight, but I lost it in a way that I could keep my weight off, and I eradicated all the triggers that made me overeat to begin with.

That is weight loss. And if you don't want to do that, then give up losing weight. Because if you don't wanna fix your life, I'm just telling y'all, I've just never met a woman who was able to lose her weight and be miserable and just not eat anymore.

And and who wants that? Nobody.

Alright.

My job stresses me out to the point I just wanna eat myself to death. I don't eat anything crappy. Doesn't matter. If you're eating your if you're over I don't care, Maggie, if you are eating fifty stalks of broccoli.

That is no way to handle your stress, but your brain has made a tie that this is how we do it. When I'm and your biggest problem is you think your job is stressing you out. Jobs cannot stress us out.

Here's what really happens. You have a job with all of its duties, and then you have a lot of thoughts about that.

This is unfair.

This is too much. I'll never be able to do it. And if I can't do it, they'll fire me.

I don't think I'm doing a good job. The biggest thing I coach on, the number one thing I coach on when it comes to working inside my program, people will come on and say, Corinne, like, my job just really stresses me out. And I'll ask them, like, what about it is stressing you out?

And they will tell me that, their workflow is really heavy. And I'll say, okay. Well, how many times have you not been able to get the work done that needs to be done?

Never.

Okay? So you obviously, your workload's not too heavy. It's more than you would like, but you also always get it done.

Well, I'm just worried my boss thinks I'm failing. And I was like, okay. Tell me about your last review. Did did did they put you on a ninety day improvement plan?

Has your when's like, did your boss call you in last week and just tell you, like, you're doing a really bad job? Well, no. I actually I I got a raise. My review was pretty good.

Oh, so your boss isn't thinking that. You're thinking that. This is where we need coaching because here's what happens. Most of you want to stay in this idea that my job stresses me out, and you keep eating over it.

So then, like, the last part of her question is, I'm just eating too many healthy snacks. How can I cut back? You can't cut back.

You can't because what happens is is that you're like, I've got a really stressful job.

Now what I wanna do is take away the one coping mechanism that I have.

You're not gonna cut it out.

Your brain's gonna be like, oh, hell no. I can't just let you drown. I can't just let you suffer.

I'm gonna actually ask for more food more often, especially when you're stressed because you're not solving the problem.

So if your job is stressing you out, the first thing we gotta do is figure out why.

Is it for real that things are not fair and that you aren't getting your job done and whatever? If that's the case, how many times have you gone to your boss with big fucking balls between your legs to talk to them?

Because very often what I watch is, like, it's one or two things.

It is a lot of self created stress that you don't know how to rewire your brain so that the self talk gets better. Because I have so many women that I coach, literally. And I'm like, it's funny to me. Your boss is telling you you're doing a great job.

You just told me how many things you finish every day.

You told me how much you're balancing and stuff. It's shocking to me that you don't walk out of there every day proud as fuck of yourself, tired because you're an amazing employee.

But when people tell me they're stressed, it's usually because they're talking to themselves very stressfully about what's happening at the work.

Because the other answer is, if you are getting negative feedback or let's say that you're you've got way too much on your plate, and you're not going to your boss and saying, we need to have a conversation.

I got a lot going on, and I wanna make sure you look really good.

So I'm gonna show you everything I'm working on right now, and I want you to prioritize it for me.

Tell me what absolutely you want me focused on, and you tell me what is the stuff that either I can wait on, you don't care about, you don't care what kind of job I do on it, or somebody else could do.

But the main thing is I wanna make sure you are getting exactly what you need.

Every time I say that, somebody goes, well, I I haven't had that conversation.

I I just kinda been just sitting there doing nothing other than stewing in my shitty little diaper at my desk all day, telling myself that I don't have any help, that I'm doing a bad job, that there's too much to do, not giving myself any credit for what I am doing, and not even going to my boss and talking to them in a way that makes them look good.

You show up at work like that, I guarantee all of you, you will be a lot less stressed.

I'm in a good place right now. How do I keep from being that person who others don't wanna be around because I'm talking too much about my journey and my success? Don't mention it.

That's the easiest part. Keep your mouth shut. If they ask you about it, talk to them because they actually are genuinely interested. If nobody's asking you about your weight loss, don't fucking talk about it. Nobody cares.

You can be excited about it, but nobody else needs to be excited about it. Also, the other way to not be that person, I'm gonna tell all of you right now, don't be a fucking food police or a martyr. If somebody offers you something, they'll go like, oh, well, I can't. You know, I I just lost, like, forty pounds, and I wanna keep it off.

Just say, no. Thanks. Not hungry right now. Leave it at that. It's not complicated.

It really isn't.

If nobody's asking you about your weight loss, you don't talk about it either. Period. End of story. That's how we don't become that person.

I am just bored and have lost my motivation. I go to bed every fucking night telling myself I will stop being lazy, first of all, and get back to working out every morning. I do the same thing, sitting on the couch and watching TV. How do I get my motivation back?

Dawn, first of all, gotta quit, number one, you're not lazy. Here's the big difference. You're just choosing not to work out. If you will quit calling yourself lazy, that will take a lot of pressure off.

Because if you say, I'm being lazy, then you start identifying as a lazy person. Lazy people don't get motivation.

That's how that works.

You have to be really careful about how you're talking to yourself.

So we can't say bullshit. That's not true.

You just have to tell yourself, I either want to do it or I don't.

That is not because I'm lazy. It's because I either want to watch TV or I want to work out.

We just make it really clear. This way our brain now identifies as somebody who makes choices, not as someone who's just inherently lazy who can't do shit.

Now the other side of it is you don't need motivation, not one ounce.

In fact, if you're waiting on motivation, you're never gonna work out.

You need reasons why you're gonna do it when you don't want to.

You need to tell yourself in the mornings, you know, I'm not wanna I'm not gonna want to. You know what I'm gonna want to do? I'm gonna want to sit on the couch and watch television. So what I'm gonna do tomorrow morning is I'm gonna get up, and I'm gonna sit on the couch, and I'm not allowed to watch TV.

I could sit there. I can doom scroll my phone. I can do whatever I want, but I can't watch television. I gotta, like, break my pattern.

So I'm gonna do that for a week. Then the next week, we wake up and we think about one small thing we can do.

We say, like, alright. I can get up, and I can sit on the couch all I want, but I'm have to sit out I'm gonna have to sit on the couch in workout clothes. And if I wanna doomscroll or whatever, I can. But for that week, it's all about I gotta get in the mode of someone who actually dresses for a workout.

And then you just keep layering on one simple step like that at a time over a course of a few weeks, and it usually doesn't take that long before you're just like, well, let me just go ahead. It's called greasing the wheels, getting some momentum.

We don't need motivation because motivation actually comes after you do things. Everybody thinks motivation happens on the front end. Motivation happens on the back end. On the front end, what happens is willingness, reasoning, talking to yourself, noticing patterns, doing the little things to see if you can get momentum to take over to where your brain naturally says, well, you know, if you're gonna put your clothes on, maybe I'll just try walking for, you know, a few minutes around the house. And then eventually, that little bit turns into the next thing. It's like watching dominoes fall.

But most of you, what you try to do is try to say, I'm lazy. I'm gonna wait until I feel really good about it while calling myself lazy.

How are you ever gonna feel good about working out if all you do is say you're lazy and you don't really plan to work out? Say you are, but you're not making any efforts to change anything.

That's how we do things. I have a, in a few weeks, you're gonna start getting some emails. And I have a free week coming up where people can work with me for a week.

And one of those if you sign up for it, one of the things that I'm gonna be teaching in just some of the emails that are gonna go out is why you do not need motivation to lose weight. In fact, if you're trying to use motivation to lose weight, you're almost guaranteed to not lose weight. Motivation is one of those things that is like it's almost useless, and it's earned.

And that's why I don't like people to rely on motivation.

I don't want them thinking that they can lose it and stuff. Motivation is one of those things we earn some. Once we start something, now we've earned the right for our brain to think, that wasn't so bad. Now the brain is more motivated to do it because once it completes something, it gets a reward. And when it gets a reward, guess what?

It wants to do more.

So to feel motivated, you actually have to do something so that the brain can be rewarded, and then it will want to do more.

Y'all, if you have a question, actually have to ask it in question form. Don't just give me statements because I don't really know what to say when you just give me a statement. Alright. Let's see how much more time.

We started at ten thirty. Okay. I'm gonna go into one of the other ones that were that were asked in email. I'm over sixty, and because there are so many parties, meals out, and sweet treats around, I struggle constantly.

If, for example, I'm going out for dinner on Saturday, I stuff myself with food on the days in between knowing that it doesn't make sense in any way, but I'm feeling, well, I'll be eating a big meal on Saturday. What's the point eating sensibly before that? This is a habit I've had for so long. So I just wanna say kudos to you for noticing, oh, I actually have a mental habit. I have a habit of telling myself this won't matter.

There's no point.

And then following through, I have the habit of following through when I hear something in my brain instead of questioning it. I don't have the habit of questioning it. I have the habit of following through. So there's like lots of little ways that we can break habits.

I've tried many approaches, but I really struggle to break this. Alright. And she said, I'm also, I know what to do, and I'm just not doing it. So let me tell you this.

So one of the problems is this person hasn't ever really challenged over and over again what is the point of actually eating healthy and sensibly during the week even though there is a meal that's coming up where you're going to eat the opposite, where you're going to eat a little bit more than you normally do and where you're going to eat foods that you normally are not eating. So I always suggest that you answer that quest those types of questions like what's the point? Why bother?

You answer them on paper, and you do it on paper because your brain makes a connection in a different way when it writes versus just when it's just letting things roll around in your head and you're thinking about it. It doesn't stick when it rolls around in your head, but our brain actually thinks we're doing something when we write. It's just like a little psychological hack for all of you. So you answer it on paper every single day for a while.

If this is your biggest problem, you wanna answer it daily. Why am I gonna bother eating healthy even when I know I have parties upcoming? And up until that party, you answer it every single day. But every day, you're gonna answer it in a slightly different way because you wanna give your brain lots of reasons why this matters, why you're gonna bother, what is the point of this.

Because right now, you think, I know it's crazy, but I do it. That is what you're telling yourself.

And right now, we gotta think something different because that's not telling yourself what the point of doing, like, doing these other things are. So we have to define that.

The next thing is you've gotta prove also to yourself that your smaller actions really do matter. And that's why we need to write about what would my life look like if I'd spent the entire year doing the exact opposite of this one behavior? If this entire year, all I did was eat sensibly instead of like a jackass leading up to vacations, holidays, parties, weekends, whatever it is.

And you want your brain to see that because your brain needs to see like, oh, it does matter. Oh, this is what it would be like. Oh, little things like this actually add up. Little things like this matter.

We have to change that whole belief, and the best way I know how to do it is not by listening to Corinne yell at you in a podcast. It's not by showing up to a lie and getting some help. The best way is writing about it. I write every single day about the things that I'm trying to change in myself too, and that is where I get the most traction.

So there's a lot more to this, but without doing these things, you can know all day long what to do.

Like, I know I should be eating sensibly, but in the like, when it comes time, you won't be able to do it because you don't fully understand why going through change even matters to you. Without that, your brain has no way to encourage you, no way to offer you a choice. The moment's like, you sure you wanna eat like a jackass? I mean, you keep writing every day about why this matters. Maybe we should do this. We want the choice to open up for ourselves.

And that is when your brain can give you something different to do in the moment. And when you have a choice, at least fifty percent of the time, you can now make a better one.

Probably more. But when you have a choice, you're at least at a fifty fifty crossroads. So the other thing to understand about this, because a lot of people really suffer with I know what to do, but I'm not doing it, there's like two parts of your brain. You have what's called the thinking part of your brain, and that's the one that thinks about like, well, I know what to do. I've been listening to podcasts. I've been listening to Corinne. And then there's the action part, but I'm not doing it.

I know what to do is the thinking part, and I don't do it is what we call our action taker brain. Now between the thinking part of the brain and the action brain, there are these two really powerful forces that are happening. Number one is you've got your habit brain, and this is the one that, like, just throws up what you normally do.

It doesn't think. It's just like, oh, party coming up. You're supposed to eat like an asshole. Only because you've done it over and over again.

That's what it does. And our habit brain, it bosses the thinking brain brain around unless we're looking for it. It's like, I know you want to do this, but you're wrong. Here's what we actually do when there's a party coming up, and we're gonna eat like an asshole for days. And that's what you have to realize is that the habit brain is going to encourage you to do the opposite of what you know to do only because that's what it's always done.

So blowing it up always feels normal to your habit brain.

Making sure that you eat like a jackass, it makes complete sense to your habit brain.

Your habit brain's like, well, that's the pattern. Why would we do anything else?

And it really thinks that you don't want to actually eat sensibly because you keep doing the opposite of what you wanna do deep down. So what we've gotta do is we have to listen to the habit brain, and then we have to use our thinking brain to talk to it. Part of the thinking brain will be writing down why things matter, why this would be better. Like, your brain, as you write these things down and starts giving it reasons, then the habit brain will come up with its stuff, and your thinking brain will be like, hey. Wait a minute. You've been writing about that a lot. I've got an opinion.

And now the habit brain and the thinking brain have to talk to each other rather than the habit brain just bossing you around.

There's a secondary force too that's happening, and this is where your reward center. Each time you eat like a jackass, you're also getting a big ass reward. You're having fun in the moment. You're also completing the cycle, and so your brain is releasing like, oh, thank God. We did exactly what we always do again, so it's always getting a reward. So this is problematic because when it's time to eat, your habit brain is always gonna say, let's go.

We always eat. When these things happen, when we have a party, whatever.

And your reward brain says, yeah, that feels so good. We've done it before. Let's do it again.

So all you need to know is this.

You need smaller things to do, so little pattern interrupts.

So, like, rather than saying, like, alright. The next time I wanna eat sensibly all week, just say, I know for sure that I'm gonna focus on when the next time I have a party, the days leading up to it, I'm gonna get all my water in.

And I'm not gonna try to, like, change the foods I eat, but I am gonna try making sure that I'm doing it when I'm hungry and I'm stopping at enough. Maybe I can start there. You have to understand why these things matter.

That's the writing part. You also have to know what signs that you can look out for that you're about to do your old pattern because you wanna call it out.

We call it notice and narrate inside my program.

And then you wanna plan for how you're gonna interrupt the pattern.

Do some small things.

What is it that you wanna do the next time you sense this coming on? Because the thing is is, like, you know your pattern. Now we gotta call it out. Now if you're an OBS woman, if you're one of my clients, you happen to be listening to this on the podcast, and a lot of you listen, we wanna use the notice and narrate, and you wanna use the pause plus permission techniques. We can use them together.

They are all inside the program. If you don't know, just ask us in Facebook or ask us in Ask Coaches. We can point you to everything. You also can just go to Ask Coaches where we're all giving y'all advice all day every day.

And you can get some help on figuring out, like, what are my patterns of where I know what to do and I'm not doing it. We will help you break it down into the smaller steps. We can walk you through all of it. And then we also I have a full training inside the membership on the whole concept of I know what to do, but I'm not doing it.

Alright.

How can I lose five pounds by New Year's? I know if I can get out of the two hundreds, it will be easier to get the rest off.

I don't believe in that.

Why would two hundred pounds be easier if you could just get five pounds off right now?

Why not just two zero five? How about we start thinking about, why don't I just start telling myself losing my weight should be done easily, not only the first five, but all of them?

Like, the way you're even asking this question makes it sound like I need you to tell me some bullshit, restrictive diet crap that I can do between now and January first so that on January first, I guess the easy road's coming.

That that's, like, not happening. Not happening at all. If you wanna lose weight between now and January, I highly recommend you do it the way you want to live the rest of your life. You go back and you listen to my podcasts.

You start doing those basics I talk about.

You start working on, I wonder why I think losing my weight's gonna be really hard. Because if you think it's gonna be really hard, then you will come up with hard things to do to lose weight. If you start thinking losing weight is it's better when you do simpler things.

It's eat like, for me, when I was when I first started, I was in such devastation.

Y'all, I was at the rock fucking bottom.

I'm I'm six feet under.

You can't imagine how miserable I was. I cried every day for hours on the couch, hating myself, hating my life, couldn't keep up with my child, thought that I was gonna lose my life, my husband, everything that mattered to me, couldn't look in a mirror, stopped buying any clothes. I was wearing his clothes because that was all that would fit. Like, y'all, I don't I don't even think I showered regularly. I was in such despair.

So if you think for a hot second, was motivated, excited, like, courageous, bold, whatever y'all think you need to be in order to start, wrong.

I started because I knew I couldn't keep going the way I was going.

And I also promised myself I wasn't gonna do anything to lose weight that I didn't think I could keep doing for the rest of my life.

And I was gonna start real small because I knew me. I couldn't afford to fuck up, not big ways. I can make little mistakes. I was at a point in my life where I can make little mistakes and this and losing weight and keep going. But if I did really hard things, I would be devastated if I screwed up.

So for me, like and I've told this story a thousand times.

My first big, like, sacrifice was I knew I couldn't give up ice cream yet.

All my other diets would always make me give up ice cream, but I was not eating ice cream because I loved ice cream.

Trust me. Ice cream's good. It's a damn good time.

But back then, you know what I was eating ice cream for? To for five, like, maybe five minutes, thirty minutes, however long, I didn't have to think about how miserable I was. I could just eat ice cream and get away from me, check out. It felt like the only time of the day where I was literally resting, where I was just taking a break. It was the only time of day I didn't feel guilty, and that's, like, hard.

And so when I started my diet, and I was like, I am gonna lose weight, my first diet rule on Corinne's no personal no BS plan was you can't eat out of the carton anymore, Corinne.

I don't care how much you put in the bowl, but we just can't eat out of the carton anymore. Because when we eat out of the carton, we eat until it's gone or we're sick.

And I couldn't do that anymore.

And it made sense to me that if I just put a whole lot in the bowl, that I could still get my break, I could still check out.

I didn't feel like I was being deprived, but I did feel like I was making a change. I felt like I was making that one tiny step forward, and that is all I needed was a bunch of tiny steps forward, and that was my entire weight loss journey.

I didn't make big steps until I lost, like, fifty something pounds.

Everything was a series of little things, but each time I made a change, I felt a little more motivated.

I felt a little bit more confident. I felt a little bit more brave. I felt a little bit better.

I felt like someone who was like, I could see myself as like, I think you're really changing.

Because I didn't do the drastic shit that would always cause me to go backward, that would always cause me to quit. Because at the time and y'all have to understand, I wasn't like me now.

Back then, if I made a mistake, I went to shit on myself.

It would be immediately me saying, you're never gonna lose your weight. You might as well just admit it. You're gonna be fat the rest of your life.

I don't know why you bother.

You're just lazy. You're gross, and you'll always be like this. That was, like, everything I used to tell myself.

And I knew somewhere deep inside that I could not set myself up to do things so hard that I would trigger that anymore.

I needed to do the littlest of things so that I would be able to encourage myself a little bit. Now throughout all of it, I'm gonna be real honest, I said a thousand times, this isn't good enough. This isn't good enough. And my big slap back to myself was, Corinne, what's not good enough is all those days you didn't do anything.

I must have told myself a million times over that what wasn't good enough was doing nothing.

That was the definition of not good enough. I had to be really clear with myself on that.

And I told myself that so much that I finally started believing it. Not only because I was telling myself every day, but as I made those small changes, instead of sitting around and quitting, sitting around and doing nothing because it wasn't all the things, you know, it only took about three weeks before the scale was really going down.

Like, three weeks of just eating less ice cream, I lost, like, three pounds.

Now when you've got a hundred to lose, three might not sound like much, but I'm gonna tell you right now, I would just tell myself, well, three is better than gaining.

And it made sense to me that maybe there's other things I can do. If this small change is working, I bet other ones will too.

And that is how it started.

It started with me talking to myself, starting off small, and then my brain started got the chance to, like, You've told me over and over again small like, small things are the opposite of not good enough.

And now after a few weeks of watching you do it over and over again, actually, the scale's going down.

Interesting. Now we have compounded rewiring how you talk to yourself with proof, and that is when motivation kicks in.

Now I was actually like, I wonder what else I can change. I wonder what else I can do.

And I would look for the things that I was ready for at that stage. And as I lost more weight, guess what?

Motivation went up. I was liking the process because I was never doing the bullshit. The weight was coming off.

I was happier with myself.

I was talking to myself differently, and that is the crux of my entire program.

That is why I created it because it worked for me, and it's worked for thousands of women, and it's the easiest way to lose weight.

It doesn't require us to change our life overnight. It doesn't require us to add more shit to our a plate that is already too full. It doesn't require us to cut out all the things that not only do we like eating, but it doesn't require us to cut out the only way we know how to get through our days.

And that's why I do what I do.

Hey, Lana. She says, I was part of the program, and I have lost eighty two pounds, and you straightened my head out. Good for you, Lana. I'm glad you're here today.

Alright, everybody. Y'all have a real good one. Thank you for coming. Make sure that you plan for next month.

We'll be sending emails out when it's when it's time for that call. You are always welcome to come, and you can always email us in at any time. Anytime you get an email from me, if you reply and say, like, hey. I would love for Corinne to answer this on the next call, we are happy to do that.

Y'all have a good one. Bye, y'all.