Updated: December 12, 2023

Episode 268: Anxiety and Weightloss

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A lot is going down in the world right now.

Hell, the last two years have NOT been a picnic for any of us.

I’m watching so many of my No BS Women going through some shit. Things like battling cancer, raising a child on the spectrum, or taking care of elderly parents who can no longer care for themselves.

World events aren’t making anything easier.

But neither will eating your face off in response to all the bullshit going down.

I know things are scary and uncertain. And yet, food still isn’t the solution, even though it SEEMS like one since you haven’t been taught anything else to do.

Today’s podcast has FOUR ways to handle uncertain times and the anxiety and stress that comes along with it.

I always say my mission is to teach every woman how to lose weight for good and feel as amazing as she deserves.

To lose weight for good, you must stop eating when shit hits the fan.

To feel as amazing as you deserve, you need ways to feel better when a crap sandwich keeps getting served to you over and over again.

I can’t change what’s happening in the world, but I can help you change how you respond to it.

Listen to Episode 268: Anxiety and Weightloss today.

Transcript

Corinne:

Hi, I’m Corinne. After a lifetime of obesity, being bullied for being the fattest kid in the class, and losing and gaining weight like it was my job, I finally got my shit together and I lost 100 pounds. Each week I’ll teach you no bullshit weight loss advice you can use to overcome your battle with weight. I keep it simple. You’ll learn how to quit eating and thinking like an asshole. You stop that and weight loss becomes easy. My goal is to help you lose weight the way you want to live your life. If you are ready to figure out weight loss, then let’s go.

Corinne:

All right, everybody. Welcome back. I have good news, Kathy Hartman’s back with us.

Kathy Hartman:

I’m back.

Corinne:

She was on vacation. You want to tell us what you did? Did you do anything fun? I don’t even remember what you did.

Kathy Hartman:

I don’t remember what I did either. It probably had something to do with those grandkids though. You know I’m keeping them next week, Corinne. Did I tell you this?

Corinne:

No.

Kathy Hartman:

So I’m going to brag on my son, Jason, for a minute. He’s my older one. He’s got the four. He gets his full actuarial credentials next week.

Corinne:

What’s that even mean? I don’t even know what an actuary is.

Kathy Hartman:

An actuary is basically a risk assessor. They do a lot of workers comp, insurance kinds of things. They set rates. That’s his area. They also work in pension plans and things like that. Anyway, fully credentialed actuaries are rare, because you have to take so many really hard math tests. Okay?

Corinne:

Okay.

Kathy Hartman:

There’s about 1,500 across the country and my son, Jason, is going to be one of them.

Corinne:

Are you going to gift him a 10 key?

Kathy Hartman:

I’m going to gift him four days in Orlando with his wife while his kids stay with me.

Corinne:

With a 10 key for the room?

Kathy Hartman:

No. He doesn’t get a 10 key. He gets four days off with his mama watching his four kids.

Corinne:

I will tell you… So if you are-

Kathy Hartman:

So we can come to your house, right? You have a pool.

Corinne:

Actually, they’re replacing the liner. I’m sorry. It is drained right now. That’s a real bust. So there’s a couple of things. Number one, if you’ve been listening to the podcast for a long time, Kathy and I have had a running joke about her love affair with 10 keys.

Kathy Hartman:

Yes.

Corinne:

Since I guess five years running now.

Kathy Hartman:

You know I don’t have one right now.

Corinne:

That joke never gets old.

Kathy Hartman:

I don’t have a 10 key anymore.

Corinne:

I’m sure there’s a small-

Kathy Hartman:

A sad place in the Hartman house.

Corinne:

I was going to say. And then the other thing, one of the reasons I was laughing when you said about him being a risk assessor, before we came on this call, Kathy and I were basically talking for an hour about Kathy’s fears and risk taking and all this other stuff. And I was like, wow, very surprising that you would birth a son who’s going to go into the business of assessing risk.

Kathy Hartman:

He is very much like me.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

“Don’t let them do that, they might get hurt,” comes out of his mouth instead of the mama’s mouth.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

But yeah. It’s not a stretch to think that I gave birth to conservative children.

Corinne:

Right. Assessing risk everywhere they go.

Kathy Hartman:

Exactly.

Corinne:

What’s your other kid do?

Kathy Hartman:

He works in supply chain.

Corinne:

Oh wow.

Kathy Hartman:

So he has a rather frustrating job over the past couple of years. But his company imports building products, which is really great in this area with all the building that goes on.

Corinne:

Right. Right.

Kathy Hartman:

They support contractors and stuff. They import and warehouse building products for contractors.

Corinne:

That’s awesome.

Kathy Hartman:

So when the barge went aground in the Suez Canal, I heard from Greg first. He called me and he said, “Go buy toilet paper and coffee because there’s a barge stuck in the Suez Canal.”

Corinne:

Hey, next time that there’s a coffee emergency, you need to let me know too.

Kathy Hartman:

Right?

Corinne:

Don’t let the Crabtrees sit here and be coffeeless.

Kathy Hartman:

So I’m very proud of my boys.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

They did really well for themselves. They have good girls. They have good kids.

Corinne:

Yeah, you’ve got all the grandbabies, all five of them.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah.

Corinne:

Well, that kind of ties into today because we’re talking about anxiety and weight loss. So you’ve got one working in a very anxious business right now with the supply chain and then the other one assessing risk all over the place. So I picked this topic because our members inside of No BS have just been going through it lately. And I feel personally that whatever our members are going through inside the membership that are, I like to call all of my podcast listeners, the future No BS women who will one day take the plunge and come work with us. All of our future No BS women are probably doing the same thing. They are doing it even at a level that where you don’t have the level of support and the ability to talk about real life things that are happening and that you’re scared and all the things.

Corinne:

So I wanted to do this podcast because a few weeks ago I went live inside the community last minute because we had so many people just panicking about and scared about things that were going on in the world. One thing I want to say is I’m going to give you today four things that you can do to honor your feelings about things that are happening all around us instead of eating through them and avoiding them. So what kind of started all this was we had several posts inside the membership. We had women who had children who are in the military, who were starting to get deployed in different areas of the world, just as safety mechanisms and stuff. We’ve had women going through cancer and getting diagnosis. It was just like this big storm of all these things and people were posting.

Corinne:

For a lot of my members, they have nowhere in the world to turn to when they’re scared, when they’re anxious. It’s either food or they turn to us. They just don’t have people in their lives who get it. They don’t have people in their lives that won’t just say, “Yeah, let’s just go out to eat. That sounds like a great idea.” They don’t have people in their lives who really want to listen to them. Or they have people in their lives who say, “Hey, don’t be scared. It’s ridiculous.” They kind of dismiss their feelings because they’re uncomfortable seeing feelings. And so I’m just reading all this and I sat for a day and literally just thought about what they’re going through and how could I best help them.

Corinne:

And one of the things that I knew that I wanted to be able to do was not only to give them ways to kind of process everything that was going on, because here’s what we always know y’all, we cannot change circumstances in the world. You cannot change, like if your child is on the spectrum, you can’t change that diagnosis. If you’ve been diagnosed with cancer or your partner’s been diagnosed with cancer, we can’t change that. If war is happening, we can’t change that. There are just things that are going to happen that we are going to have to realize that the only thing that can change and the best thing that can change is our response to it.

Corinne:

I like to think about it this way. Before I go off and try to have a response to change a circumstance, I want to make sure that I am first changing my internal response for me. I want to help me feel relaxed or I want to help me feel calm or I want to help me feel grounded. I want to somehow figure out, first and foremost, how is this impacting me in my own brain? The one thing that I know that happens for all of us who struggle with weight is if we can’t make sense of things in such a way that we can change our internal discussion with ourselves, we will reach for the food. That has been our coping mechanism. And I did that for years. I believe Kathy has done that for years in the past.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah. No doubt.

Corinne:

I still do it. Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah.

Corinne:

I still have times now where I catch myself and I’m like, I am eating because I am just at my stressed out max. I have let my brain stay too focused on what’s wrong in my life, what’s wrong in the world and things, and I’m not taking care of myself mentally. I don’t have to have better thoughts about everything, but I need to have compassion for myself in this moment and say, “You know what? You got a lot going on. It is no wonder you feel this way.” And sometimes I have to have a good cry. The other day I literally…

Kathy Hartman:

Poor old Chris.

Corinne:

I’d had a long day at work. A few things hadn’t gone right. I was just in the dooder. I’d had a terrible workout that morning, probably getting ready to start my period if I had to guess. All the things were happening. And he walked into the bedroom and I just looked at him and I said, “I need you to leave.” I was like, “You can’t be in here right now. I’m fixing to start crying. I don’t want to be fixed. I don’t even want you to touch me.” And I said, “This has nothing to do with you, babe.” I just said, “I am in such a vulnerable state right now that you trying to console me will either piss me off or it will make me feel shame for feeling the way I do.” I was like, that is such a compassionate thing that Corinne’s doing for herself right now.

Kathy Hartman:

Absolutely.

Corinne:

And he looked at me and he was like, “Okay.” He turned around and he walked out, closed the door.

Kathy Hartman:

Probably had a little bit of sigh of relief too.

Corinne:

I’m sure. I mean-

Kathy Hartman:

Thank goodness she’s got this one. I’m out.

Corinne:

Well, yeah. Well, I don’t know though. Chris is a fixer.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah. Ken is too.

Corinne:

Chris always wants to try to make me feel better. And this is where Chris and I kind of are different, I guess, is Chris is not one to want to feed me through it. He’s never been one to want to like, let me make things easier. He always wants to talk about it. And he wants to give me his enlightened opinion and his brain works very different than mine. When I am in the shitter about something, I want to be there for a minute. I just want to validate every thought. I want to sit there and feel bad. I want to be in a pity party in a constructive way. I just want to sit there and be like, I am mad or I am upset and it is okay. And I know that it’s my thinking, but I don’t want to change it either. I agree with my thinking in this moment and I need to let it all out. And when I do that, for me, that’s processing my emotions.

Kathy Hartman:

I’m the same way, Corinne.

Corinne:

Yes.

Kathy Hartman:

I’m the same way. Yeah.

Corinne:

You feel it.

Kathy Hartman:

I have to feel it all the way through in order to even get to a place where I can be productive with it.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

I have to sit in the shitter too. I totally get that.

Corinne:

And then what’s different is what I used to do is I would internalize things. I would sit there and be like, I feel like shit. And I would be blaming. I’d be like, this thing is causing my feelings. Or this blah, blah blah is causing my feelings. And I would be so overwhelmed by my emotions that I would want to eat. I just need to eat to get away from it. If I eat, I’ll just feel better and then I’ll be able to go fix it. I was always for years, very into fixing what was wrong, trying always to just feel better. And now I think what happens is I’m in the mode of accepting that there will always be things that go wrong and that’s okay. I know that things will work out eventually, but sometimes I want to be in the muck of crap. Even if it feels like crap to me, it feels crappier to now avoid it.

Corinne:

And so, anyway, I know that’s kind of muddy. If you are newer to this podcast, you’re like, “What the fuck does this have to do with some weight loss?” Let me tell you what it has to do with weight loss. When you get really good at understanding, and we have podcasts, Kathy, maybe you can dig through them. Anything that has to do with thinking and eating, along those lines, maybe even early cuts. If you can just do one thing, which is every single time I feel bad or happy, any kind of emotion, it’s because I’m thinking something about a situation, a person, or a thing.

Corinne:

And even if you don’t know how to change a thought, even if you don’t know how… Like you don’t know all the nuances that we teach inside of No BS, if you just do this one thing, this has brought me more peace than anything else in my life. And I am somebody who has suffered with deep, dark depression, is to tell myself, the only thing that’s going on right now is my brain is sending me a lot of thoughts. That’s what’s causing my feelings right now. My interpretations of what happens, that is what’s causing my feelings right now, and that’s okay. Sometimes I agree with my thoughts. Just like, let’s say someone gets killed and by a drunk driver, for instance. I don’t want to be okay with that. That’s when I want to have the thought, that’s wrong. That shouldn’t have happened. I’m upset because I believe in all my soul that people shouldn’t be killed by drunk drivers.

Corinne:

I may feel bad, but that is a bad I’m willing to have. If someone bullies my kid, I don’t want to work myself up into excitement and joy over it. What I want to be is pissed like a mama bear. I want to sit there and be like, that shouldn’t happen to my child, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I want to feel all of it. I want to agree with all of it. And then I want to tell myself, and now what are we going to do about it? Because when I allow myself my anger, when I allow myself all of my anxiety, when I allow all of that, then I’m at a clean spot where I can be like, all right, and now what do we do? How do I want to think about this?

Corinne:

So let’s use the example of Logan. Let’s say Logan gets bullied and stuff. I’ve used him several times inside our podcasts. When I get over all of the, those little shits shouldn’t say things like that to my kid and blah, blah, blah, I’m going to sit and think about how do I want to think about this? And it’s probably going to be, there’s no one better suited than me to protect my cub. That doesn’t get me feeling happiness or acceptance or this is all okay. It gets me into authority. But I can’t get there until I have my little shitty party. If I go eat, I’m never going to get to no one better than me to handle this. If I go eat, then I’m going to be in the shit spiral of, well if it hadn’t of happened, I wouldn’t have over ate. And now I blew my diet. Now I’m going to have to knuckle down and now I’m going to have to do this. We use so often our food as the grand distractor from figuring our shit out, from feeling our emotions, and we slow ourselves down in our life.

Corinne:

And so to bring this all to the four things, I was watching my members and they were really suffering. Anxiety was high, feelings of despair, fear of their own lives, fear of their child’s lives. It just was one of those weeks where in the membership, people were just going through it. I think we had three different members get diagnosed with cancer in one week. Just lots and lots of things. So I decided that I wanted to teach them these four things. And this is four things that you can do in order to honor your feelings so that you don’t feel like you have to eat. So whenever you feel a big emotion, like anxiety, fear, worry, or sadness, you have some choices, but the two main ones that I want us to focus on today is option one, is you eat. That will make it go away temporarily.

Corinne:

But when you eat, here’s what doesn’t happen. The original thinking creating all of those emotions was never looked at, never honored, never sat with, and never even questioned. If that’s the thought you want to move forward with, when we eat, we are just left with that thought being true. And now, whatever it is that we were thinking is to blame for why we can’t lose weight. So now we’re in a double shit storm. I got anxiety about my weight now, plus I got anxiety about the world. So the very first one is can versus can’t mentality. I want you to ask yourself in those moments, what can I do right now when my brain is thinking about everything that I can’t handle?

Corinne:

Sometimes what we can do is, like let’s say we’re worried about war in another country. We can’t control war, but we can control if we donate money. We can control if we send care packages. We can control if we pray for them. We can control how much news consumption we take in. Those are things that are in our control. And when we think about what we can be doing versus what’s out of our control, there will be a sense of relief from feeling like things are out of your control. There will also be a little bit of grounding. I don’t know about y’all, but when I feel like things are out of my control, I literally feel like Dorothy in freaking Wizard of Oz sucked up in the tornado, and I’m just watching witches on brooms go by out the window.

Kathy Hartman:

Witches on bicycles.

Corinne:

Yes. All the things. It literally feels like everything is just storming around me. And when I start thinking about, what is in my control? What can I do in this situation? It just settles me down. It breaks the spiral. We’ve had a podcast, two different podcasts, one called The Worry Bucket and Worry 2.0. If you go back and listen to those, they also give you more tips and tricks on worries and what you can do. You can make lists, you can do all these different things. I think they’re very valuable tools for you to use to calm yourself down.

Kathy Hartman:

And that goes back to when you said… I wrote this down because it was eyeopening for me, obviously, was instead of just reacting to whatever’s going on around you, if you take that pause and change your internal response, that’s what you’re talking about here.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

When you really think, what’s in my control here? Or what can I do versus what can’t I do? It’s in that pause moment before you just react.

Corinne:

Yeah. It’s like when… None of us can control circumstances, but we can always control how we treat ourselves through them. And I think that’s the thing that we all forget. You are the one controlling if you eat through it. You’re also the one that controls if you love yourself through it. If you allow yourself some space to feel shitty. You’re the one that if you allow yourself a good cry. If you allow yourself to talk to someone about it. You are the one in control of how you treat yourself through anything.

Corinne:

The next one is I’m safe. So for me, one of the things that I’ve been doing, I’ve been doing a little work with my coach now for a little over a year. I’ve been doing the inner child work, I’ve been doing the crying, I’ve been doing all the things that you would do when you are getting very in touch with your emotions. And she taught me this and this has been so good for me, is when I just feel very unsafe, it doesn’t even make sense why I feel so unsafe. I know rationally nothing bad is happening to me in this moment and yet the panic, the overall, the fear, it is reverberating through my body like a fucking boss lady. I put my hand over my heart and then I just close my eyes and I take some deep breaths. For some of you, you may want to take timed breathing. But for me, I just take big, deep breaths in and I blow it out. And I pat my heart and I just tell myself, I am safe.

Corinne:

I am just really in this moment trying to show my nervous system I care. I see you. This is understandable. This is not crazy. All of you, when you feel overwhelmed, when you feel panicked, when you feel anxious and stuff, you are not broken. There is nothing wrong with you. There’s no reason to feel guilt or shame over your emotions. You do not need to judge them. You are a human having a human response in that moment and your body needs you. When your body is doing all that, it is saying, show me some love, honey. I can’t do it without you. And it just needs you to just take a beat. And if you’re at work and this happens, go sit on the pot. Just tell everybody, “I got to go pee.” Go sit on the potty and do this. There’s nothing wrong with doing it. Stop, drop, and pat that heart and do what you got to do.

Kathy Hartman:

I do the same thing. I don’t pat mine, but I take both my hands and I put them together, like the one hand on top of the other.

Corinne:

You could put it in the camera.

Kathy Hartman:

And they both go over my heart.

Corinne:

Later on in the video, they may edit this out, Kathy.

Kathy Hartman:

That’s right. I put it right here and I press in. It’s almost like giving myself a hug. Ken would say it activates your heart chakra. I don’t even know what that means, except it’s a yoga thing. And apparently there’s an energy source right around your heart that you can really calm just by putting your hands over it and pressing in. And it really does work.

Corinne:

It does. What I was telling people the other day is like, when I put my hand over my heart, even when I do it just while we’re talking on the podcast, there is a sense that happens in my body where it feels like it’s being protected. And I think that that’s important for all of us when we feel hurt by other people, when we feel worried, when we feel bad, just putting your hand over your heart means I see this. And your body is like, okay, I can relax a little. She’s paying attention.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah. I got you.

Corinne:

This is covered. So there are chakras. You know I studied the yoga right before the kid.

Kathy Hartman:

I know. I know you did.

Corinne:

I don’t know tons about it, but I think there’s 10, 9 or 10 or something. 9 pops out, but there may even be more. But there’s the throat chakra. There’s a bunch of them. Your stomach has one.

Kathy Hartman:

All I know is that his teacher training teacher told him that she hopes he finds his chakras, because Ken couldn’t figure out the chakras.

Corinne:

Well, this is what’s hilarious. I am sure there are yogi people right now listening to this podcast going, Corinne and Kathy, please. I’m going to email them right now. I’m going to explain all the chakras to them.

Kathy Hartman:

I’m happy for you to do so.

Corinne:

Girl, you better watch out. We only got like 250,000 people that listen a week. We’ll get all the-

Kathy Hartman:

The best one of you all needs to email me.

Corinne:

Yeah. All of you get together.

Kathy Hartman:

That’s right.

Corinne:

Decide who can explain it the best, and then one of you send us an email.

Kathy Hartman:

And I’ll share it with Ken because he didn’t get it.

Corinne:

Or you know what we could do? Google it. There’s always the Google.

Kathy Hartman:

We could. We could.

Corinne:

All right. Oh, what’s hilarious is one of your dearest friends is a yoga teacher.

Kathy Hartman:

Right?

Corinne:

We could probably just ask Robin.

Kathy Hartman:

We should just ask her. I should just ask Robin.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

You asked me, while we’re in a pause here, you asked me for a podcast on thoughts and number 148 is how watching your thoughts affects weight loss.

Corinne:

There you go.

Kathy Hartman:

That was the one that stood out to me. So it’s a couple years old, but y’all can find it and it’ll be fine.

Corinne:

Exactly. And just everything I said in the beginning, go listen to that one. And understand, oh, this is… I actually was teaching this today. The hardest thing for a human to comprehend is that it doesn’t make me feel bad. I was saying, it ain’t done shit to any of us, and yet we have blamed it for everything that’s gone wrong in life. It is like the global symbol for a douchebag, for circumstances, the scale, our weight. All these its make me feel bad. I promise all of you, one of the things that if you ever join No BS, that will change your fucking life and your weight like a boss forever is when you learn how to stop thinking things are causing your feelings.

Corinne:

When you really understand the fucking energy plant that you have in your brain, how much authority you have in your life that you’re leaving on the table every day because you don’t understand how to change your thoughts. You don’t understand how to listen to them. And I have got the simplest frameworks in the world inside there. It is life changing. All right. Number three, in the moments of anxiety and all the things, appreciate your life. Now, do not do this to shame yourself for like, well, I’m upset about this, so if I appreciate my life, I’m a bad person for feeling bad about things. This is not a shame cycle thing. This is one of those things where in the worst of times, what we do is we tend to ignore what is right in our life.

Corinne:

And I want you to remind yourself what is right in my life, just to give equal air time that there are things that are upsetting right now. There are all kinds of circumstances happening in the world that my brain feels so threatened, it feels so scared, it is so worried over, it is so upset about, but there are also things that I can also never forget. I’ve got an amazing family. Maybe you have a great job. Maybe you have a best friend that you can’t live without. Whatever it is, think about who are you blessed to have in your life? What are you lucky to have? And this is one of those things where you want to think about again, in a way to say, there’s just times in life where there are things that aren’t going to be good. That never means there aren’t things that I can also appreciate. And you don’t do that to yourself in a way to shame yourself for feeling bad. We do it to just show ourselves there’s two sides of every story always.

Corinne:

And then the last one is you don’t need to feel good. I think this is a big one. I think we’re all on such the pursuit to always feel good about ourselves. We think we’re always supposed to be happy. That is not the way life works. One of the things that my teacher has always talked about that’s really helped me is that we can’t appreciate the good unless we have experienced the bad. I was thinking about it this morning, because I knew we were going to be podcasting on this. And I was pondering this question about what are the things in my life that felt so terrible in the moment, but now I’m like, my life is so much better because it was so hard?

Corinne:

And I was thinking about my first husband, and terrible experience that was. He lied to me. I eloped with someone. If you don’t know my story, I attempted suicide at 17. I was in a terrible emotional mess, and that was Mother’s Day of ’92. And then by July 22nd of ’92, I had eloped with a guy that I had started dating in January of that year. And he wasn’t a good guy. Now, if he’s ever listens to this podcast, I’m not going to say his name. If he ever listens to this podcast, I’m way over you, dude. I don’t harbor ill will, all the things. But he cheated on me several times, stole money from me. I gave up a college scholarship to quit work and become a server so I could support us. Just so many things happened.

Corinne:

And when I walked out on that marriage, I was at one of the lowest lows of my life. I was already up to 250 pounds again. Actually, no, that was the first time I hit 250, because I’d never hit 250 in high school. I had been around 200, but when I was with what’s his name, I’m not going to say his name. When I was with him, I got into my fighting weight eating 24 sugar cookies every day. I was literally… I should have known something was up because all I wanted to do was eat while I was around him. And it was because I knew I was living in fear and anxiety that he was cheating and leaving, and I was going to be all alone and that no one would ever love me.

Corinne:

And I was thinking about that situation. I would’ve never ever known what a good man Chris was, unless I had been married to such a shit. I would’ve never appreciated the kind of marriage that I have. I would’ve never appreciated… And I don’t mean, like I thought that me and I’ll just call him P, I thought we had a good time until I look at my marriage now and realize what connectedness is really like. What a best friend in a marriage is really like. What a good time really is like. I wouldn’t have it without the contrast. And so it’s just really important that we don’t have to feel good all the time. That there are times in our life where we want to be hurting. I needed every ounce of pain and grieving and fear that I would never meet anybody else. I had to go through all of it to find Chris.

Corinne:

And I’m glad that I didn’t choose safety of like, well, I could just keep hanging onto him. I’d have somebody. I didn’t want to settle for safe, putting up with, this is as good as it’s going to get. I needed to feel the strong emotions in order to be able to find what was going be right for me. So we don’t always want to be in a rush to feel good about things. Some things are unjust. Some things in this world that happen are just wrong or they are bad, but we want to honor those feelings instead of hiding from them. And when we see that sometimes life’s biggest struggles are useful, and this is the thing, when you’re in the middle of a struggle, it’s really hard to see why it’s useful. But what you can do is you can go back to past struggles and you can take a hard look at them, and you can see that you survived times that you didn’t think you would. You can see all of that pain set me up for now.

Corinne:

So you can just believe that whatever you’re going through now, it’s like, I’m probably more likely to survive than it to break me, because I have survived other things. I’m more likely to one day look back on this and it won’t be life’s biggest struggle. And even if it is, I’m probably more likely to have come through it and learned something from it. I don’t know what it is today. I don’t know what the lesson’s supposed to be. I don’t know any of that stuff. But what I can think about is that I’ve had tough times before and I obviously had some kind of resiliency to get through them. And everyone, like I’ve just never talked to anybody who can’t tell me something that at the time they were going through it, thought it was the worst thing that could happen, or it sucks so bad, or whatever. And they’re looking back on it now and at the very least they can say, “And I got through it.”

Kathy Hartman:

I often teach in the membership when I’m coaching someone who’s lost a family member or lost someone close to them, that you shouldn’t try to not feel sad. You should feel sad, because what that indicates, what grief indicates is love, right? Because you’re not going to grieve somebody you couldn’t stand to be around.

Corinne:

Right.

Kathy Hartman:

You grieve someone that you felt real affection for and real love for. So it goes into that whole concept of you have to know what sad feels like in order to know what happy feels like. You have to know the not so pleasant feelings in order to really appreciate the good ones.

Corinne:

Yeah. The thought that I gave the membership that I often tell myself is I don’t like this and that’s okay. I’ve survived every bad feeling that I’ve ever had and I bet this time’s going to be no different. Because at the end of the day, most of us have survived every feeling. We just want to stop surviving them and we want to start figuring out how to go through them, how not to react to them so strongly, and just have them in a way that we honor ourselves. All right, everybody. So we’ve given you some podcasts to listen to. You can go back to the deep cuts library here at The Losing 100 Pounds Podcast. Also want to do a little announcement. I don’t do this very often, but in fact it’s been two years since we’ve done a live workshop where we have allowed our public to come.

Corinne:

So the membership is proud to invite you to the Summer Reset Workshop with No BS. So all of my members are coming and we are inviting all of you. You can get information about how much it costs and all this other kind of good stuff at losing100workshop.com. And what we’re going to do that day is we are going to spend from 9:00 AM to 2:00 PM Central Time setting you up for the summer so that you can lose weight. We’re going to talk a lot about things that get in the way of summer weight loss. I’m going to tell you how to vacation, to be able to eat the food you like, not be sitting around miserable like a mean ass bitch or eating your face off because you think you can’t lose weight. We’re going to talk about vacations, picnics, camping, kids being out, routines being screwed up, all the things. Or just relaxing.

Corinne:

Hell, we have been through it for two years. We’ve had two summers where we can’t have the summer that we really want. This is probably one of the first summers that we actually get to like, I’m getting out there, I’m going to do the things. And what I don’t want is everybody to go into the summer because they’ve been pent up like caged animals and just tearing through food like the Tasmanian devil. That is not the summer that we want to have. I promise you that in this workshop, I can teach you that you can lose weight and enjoy food you love and enjoy the people around you without losing your fucking mind and without gaining a bunch of weight over the summer. And not being miserable. Nobody needs to be miserable losing weight. That’s the worst thing that the diet industry’s doing to us these days.

Corinne:

So if you want to join us, all you got to do is go over to Losing 100 Workshop. It’s going to be on June 4th. It is from 9:00 AM to 2:00 PM. If you cannot-

Kathy Hartman:

Central Time.

Corinne:

Central Time.

Kathy Hartman:

Central Time.

Corinne:

Central Time. But if you can’t attend live, no worries. We are recording all of it and everyone will get replays and you will get to keep them. I am not the kind of person who’s like, “Oh, you only got a few days to watch your replays.” If you pay for something, I’m going to let you keep some shit. So if you come, you’re going to be able to have a great start to your summer, and I promise we’re going to take care of you just like a no BS woman. Anything else you want to say, Kathy Hartman?

Kathy Hartman:

No, I’m just glad to be back. I’ve missed you, Corinne.

Corinne:

I know. Well, it’s so funny because it’s like we… I had to record a couple episodes. I was like, oh my God. I got to record these episodes by myself.

Kathy Hartman:

I know.

Corinne:

I don’t think I’ve recorded a solo podcast in five years. I think you’ve-

Kathy Hartman:

I don’t think you have either.

Corinne:

Yeah.

Kathy Hartman:

Yeah.

Corinne:

So it was funny to just sit here in the mic and talk to myself. So, all right. We’re glad you’re back too. We will talk to all of you soon. Bye y’all.

Corinne:

Thank you so much for listening today. Make sure you head on over to nobsfreecourse.com and sign up for my free weight loss training on what you need to know to start losing your weight right now. You’ll also find lots of notes and resources from our past podcasts to help you lose your weight without all the bullshit diet advice. I’ll see you next week.

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I'm Corinne Crabtree

Corinne Crabtree, top-rated podcaster, has helped millions of women lose weight by blending common-sense methods with behavior-based psychology.

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Tried Everything to Lose Weight? I Did Too!

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