Corinne:
Hello everyone. So if you’re watching the replay, my name is Corrine Crabtree. I am the host of the Losing 100 Pounds Podcast that you can find on Apple iTunes. I am also the creator and founder of the No BS Weightloss program. And today is what we call a public live, which means that every third… I believe it, yes, every third Tuesday of the month, you are going to get a free live Q and A session with me.
Corinne:
Sometimes I’m going to teach a little something like today, I’m going to teach a little something, then we’re going to get into Q and A and then you just wait until the next month. And in between here’s what you do, so a lot of you do are not a member of my No BS Weightloss Program, that’s cool. We will be opening the doors again March 2nd. So if you’re not a member, go ahead and put on your calendar right now, March 2nd is when Corinne’s opening the doors again, and I will no longer have to wait to be able to have Corinne in my ear as much as I want and very personalized messaging.
Corinne:
So in the meantime, you need to make sure that if this is the first time you’ve heard from me, you should walk your ass on over right now. You can leave the Facebook, you can leave this live, if you’re watching the replay, push pause, you can go do it now. I want you to go to NoBSfreecourse.com. And I want you to sign up for my free weight loss course. You’re going to get a series of videos. I’m going to teach you the basics of how to get started on losing weight. I lost 100 pounds. I’ve been able to keep it all for 15 years. I have taught thousands of women inside my membership how to lose weight. And over 38 million people have listened to my podcast to this date, many of which who are losing weight because they email me every single day.
Corinne:
So you take the free course first. The second thing that you’re going to do is you are going to make sure that you listen to the podcast every Friday. So each and every Friday, I drop a podcast with my co-host Kathy Hartman. And we talk about stuff that women need to know about weight loss. We will not fool you, we will not trick you, we will not give you bullshit, we will not tell you exactly what to eat. We’re not going to do anything complicated, but every single week, we are going to be talking about real issues that stand in the way of you and your weight loss. And the last thing that you need to do is between now and then you need to make sure that you catch this replay, that you watch this live, that you put on your calendar, third Tuesday, 9:00 AM Central Time, Corinne will go live. This is my only chance to have an opportunity to interact with her.
Corinne:
So if you take the free course, you will always get a reminder of this Facebook live. You will also get a reminder of every podcast and you’ll get Monday wisdom from me every single Monday. Then you listen to the podcast, that will help you figure out some of your shit between now and then. And then the last thing that you’re going to do is you’re going to attend this live once a month. And if you can’t attend it live, you don’t bitch and you don’t moan. This is one of the things that if you’re one of my No BS women that you know that I preach about all the time, we’re grown ass women, we don’t sit around and think about why shit’s hard for us and what we can’t do and how our life’s not set up, and woe is me because I can’t come to a live.
Corinne:
That’s fucking bullshit. Here’s what you do, you watch replays. We are in the day and age right now where if you really want to lose weight, it’s easier than it’s ever been. Hell 15 years ago, I couldn’t Google dick. 15 years ago I couldn’t even find a podcast or go to a free live and have somebody at least yell at me to tell me, get your shit together, Corinne. Those things were not happening back then. I still had to go to a Weight Watchers meeting if I wanted to be with other people who were trying to lose weight, we don’t have those excuses anymore. If you ain’t got time to watch me live, because maybe you’re a teacher, you’re a doctor, you got some job where they’re going to fire your ass for watching a live, guess what you don’t do? Make excuses.
Corinne:
Excuses has never helped one woman loose some weight. That should be the golden rule of weight loss, my excuses don’t help me. So stop making them. You know what you do? You push play at a time that you can watch it. That’s all you do. If you’re at the grocery store, get your earbuds in and quit listening to the announcements or Muzak of the store and listen to a replay. Now I’m all fired up because we’re going to talk today about New Year’s diets and where your ass is at with it. Most people all started some kind of grand shenanigan diet on January one, you got marketed by everybody and anybody on the internet and TV, that it is time for you to lose weight. If you went to the grocery store, your magazines were filled with articles on how to lose 15 pounds in 10 days, all kinds of shit.
Corinne:
So today we’re going to talk about New Year’s diets because one of the things is all of my No BS… If you are a No BS woman, here’s what I would love for to see in the comments please hashtag it. No BS woman and tell us when you joined or tell if you don’t want to tell us when you joined, say hashtag No BS woman, and what is one thing that you love about being an No BS woman? What makes it special? What makes it great? Leave that in the comments. All right.
Corinne:
So I want to talk about the New Year’s diet thing because for my women, what we decided to do this year is I hosted a full day workshop on January 2nd, called Building You of 2022, where I taught them… We know the four basics of weight loss. So if you’re new to me and you go to my podcast, you need to look for episodes where I talk about the four basics of weight loss. If you listen to the first 10 episodes, I’m going to cover what I teach when it comes to losing weight, it is very simple. Drink water, we have a game around here if you’re new to this Facebook live every single time I cuss, guess what you do? You drink water.
Corinne:
One, it’ll get you hydrated. Here’s what you don’t do. You don’t drop comments saying, “I don’t like your cussing, you’re crude. Who raised you? I bet your mama’s proud.” Guess what? My mama is proud. I got this mouth from her and she got it from her mother. Even my granny was a cusser. Look, you don’t like my mouth, this is what you do. You gracefully exit. You don’t like throw a piece of shit on my comment wall about what you think about my mouth right before you leave. Just take your ass somewhere else. It’s that simple. I know not everybody loves the way I talk. I don’t need everybody to love the way I talk. You know the only person in the world that matters? Corinne. Corinne loves the way she talks. Super comfortable. Husband thinks it’s hilarious. I love me. He loves me.
Corinne:
I’m pretty rock solid. So if you don’t like it, this is not going to be the podcast for you. This is not going to be the weight loss program for you. It’s called No BS. It’s not going to be a shocker that the word shit is going to be said like it’s a religion. All right. So all of my women, we went through a workshop and this month were going through my entire weight loss course together because I know number one, that even if you’re just a podcast listener, you need to listen to shit more than one time. I am not going to say something that’s going to override all of your bullshit thinking about losing weight. There’s no way that I’m going to be able to say something to you one time, be like, you know what Corinne, I walked up in here thinking I couldn’t lose weight. Now suddenly every doubt of mine is gone. Every single thing that I thought about myself is now in reverse, I’m capable. I’m strong. I’m going to lose all my weight.
Corinne:
It’s not going to happen. So you got to listen to things more than once. So my No BS women are all going through the course again together. And we’re riding high this month on getting some shit done. I didn’t want to teach them nothing new. A lot of you started some brand new fucking diet, for my No BS women, we ain’t going to do nothing new. Guess what we going to do? What we always do. We’re just going to do it together. And we’re going to focus this month and we’re going to pay attention. To lose weight, number one, you got to be willing to start paying attention. Most of you think you got to find the perfect meal plan. The perfect calorie range, the perfect something.
Corinne:
No, you don’t. You have got to start paying attention to why you’re eating, when you’re eating, are you actually hungry? Is your body telling you you’ve had enough? When you start paying attention, and that’s what I teach you in the four basics, the more you pay attention, the more you make different choices for yourself. When we’re not paying attention to what we’re eating and we’re not paying attention to our body, then we just eat on automatic pilot. And for most of us, this is very common and nothing to be ashamed about. When you eat on automatic pilot, you just do it like you’ve always done it. You have no reason to stop before your plate’s clean. If you’re just eating on autopilot, guess what? You clean your plate. Why? You are always taught to clean plate. That’s what everybody in your family did.
Corinne:
That seems normal. That seems whatever. Except you over serve yourself often and cleaning your plate all the time is adding weight onto your body every single year, not paying attention to what your body needs, how much your body needs, is getting in your way of fucking losing weight. So we talk a lot about this inside of No BS. So the first thing I want you to do about your New Year’s diet is I just want you to ask yourself, how is it going? And yes, this may be reversed. I’m not sure. That’s all right though. I’m going to say it out loud. And if you can’t read it in reverse, just listen to the sweet ass words that come out of my mouth. All right. So how’s it going? Just be honest with yourself.
Corinne:
That’s the first thing is you just want to say like, “All right, I started something on January one, here it is January the 18th. I’m halfway through the first month of the year. How are things going? Am I staying on plan? Am I following the things? Do I like it? Do I not like it?” You just want to be honest with it because a lot of you, what happens is you start diets. And this is not just January one, but it’s every Monday, first of the month, whatever starting point that we all glorify as if it’s the perfect time. Y’all get like two or three weeks in and some problems come up, you still have some of your old habits kicking in. And you’re not being honest about what’s going on. You’re just immediately going from I was doing so good, now I’m a failure. And it’s really important in the beginning to start asking yourself how’s it going, being really honest, deciding what you like and you don’t like about it and then making changes for yourself.
Corinne:
Shifting gears if you notice that you’re… If the first two weeks you were writing your food down each day and whatever, and you notice now you’re not, rather than thinking see, I knew it, it wouldn’t work. This sucks, blah, blah, blah, blah. You just say, “What is the easiest way for me to get going again on writing it down each day?” You do it from a calm mindset. When you do it from a calm mindset, you’re more likely to act like a calm person, not like a freaking out lunatic because you’re sitting there thinking I’ve fucked up. I’m never going to lose weight. I always fail. You got to set all that bullshit aside. Just because it’s not going perfectly has nothing to do with the person you are. It just means there are these things that are not going right, right now.
Corinne:
This is the king ding dong question of all time. What’s the easiest way for me to get this done so you can bypass your bullshit. I love… For my clients they always know every single day in our planner, I give them a custom planner for No BS it goes along with everything we teach. And one of the questions is, how am I going to make my weight loss easy today? How can I make weight loss easy today? How can I make weight loss easier tomorrow? I’m having them answer that question every single day, because you have to override the idea that your weight loss is hard, that your weight loss is impossible, that your weight loss is all these things. The only way for it to get easier is for you to start identifying easy things you can do so that you can build a few wins.
Corinne:
And as you build a few wins, you start getting momentum and you start looking for more easy things to do and challenging things after a while of doing a few things well, what you thought was challenging now seems to be an easy thing to try next. So it’s really important. So if you’ve taken my free course, I talk about this concept throughout the free course. It’s really important that you go to NoBSfreecourse.com and you sign up for it. If that concept is like, what are you talking about, building small wins? What are you talking about when you think about little things that are easy, doable steps, it’s in the free course. If you’re No BS woman, it is all in module one of No BS. It is the four basics. It’s all about doable planning, doable hunger, all the concepts that I teach you in module one, which all of you have finished because we are now… Most of us are at module two and three of No BS this month.
Corinne:
The second thing that you’re going to do when it comes to a New Year’s diet is you need to ask yourself and start checking in on is what I’m doing sustainable? I think that this is very important because what a lot of you do is especially on New Year’s, y’all pick things like I’m going to do a Whole 30 and I’m going to do keto, and I’m going to do 75 Hard, or I’m going to do insert some like Optavia where I’m only going to drink two or three shakes a day. I’m going to do a detox. Y’all pick some stuff that you know in your heart that it breaks one of Corrine’s rules. One of my rules. So when I was starting off and I was going to lose 100 pounds, I didn’t know I was going to lose 100 pounds, but I did know this, that I was going to have to figure out how to lose some weight. I was so miserable. I was crying. I was eating my life away. It was just terrible.
Corinne:
All I knew was that I was going to figure it out. I thought about what fucked me up in every diet. And what I had found was I had a really clear pattern of starting shit that I had… Here’s how you know you got a shitty diet, I’m going to try to do this and get my weight off, and then I’ll figure it out. Or I think I can do this for the first 20 or 30 pounds, then I’m going to figure out how to live life. Or I’m going to do this, it’s going to be really hard and difficult, but everybody says it works. So I’m just going to do it. All right, this breaks the rule for me of when I got started and saw my pattern of doing bullshit antics, I knew that when I lost weight, that I was going to have to figure out how to do it in a way that I could do the rest of my life.
Corinne:
I really thought about it. And I knew that there was probably never going to be a time in my life where I wouldn’t want to be thinner. There was never going to become a day where I was just like, I’m going to cross this magic age and after that age I won’t give a shit. I’m just going to eat what I want and be overweight and I’ll have no care in the world and I’ll just, as my granny say, fat, dumb, and happy. I knew that I was probably going to live long life and that life, I would want to be able to fit into airplane seats. And in that life, I would want to be able to go out for a walk and not need a walker. Or I was probably going to one day, have grandkids and want to be able to get in the floor with them and play and not be the grandma stuck in a chair who can’t get up.
Corinne:
I had this idea that my husband and I, we love each other, probably going to want to have sex, even in my 70s and 80s. He’s going to see me naked at the rest of my life. So I just knew that whatever I was going to do, I was going to need to be able to do that throughout the rest of my life and like it and enjoy it and it just be who I am. So that meant that when it came in for checking in for sustainability, I had to figure out how am I going to do this the rest of my life?
Corinne:
So if that’s the question, then I’m only going to do things that I know that as of today, I’m willing to do it. And I’m willing to do it for a long time. This is beautiful. So all of my No BS women, please pay attention because I talk about this a lot, but I want you to hear it one more time from me. Where you’re at today and what you’re willing to do today doesn’t mean that there’s not a version of you that does a lot of different things at the end.
Corinne:
But what most of us do is we get this idea of like the version of me who loses all of her weight is eating puritanical. And the version of me that loses all her weight is exercising six days a week. And the version of me, she never has a drink and she never eats desserts or we just have all these fantasies about what it’s like. You need to set that version of you aside for a moment and you need to stay very present and focused on, but the version of me today that gets there, she starts someplace. She doesn’t start at the end. She doesn’t start with a revolution of her life. She starts by looking at what is she mentally ready for and emotionally prepared to do today? Those things, you get good at them.
Corinne:
What it does is it builds resilience. It builds confidence. It starts showing you that you can say I’m going to do something and follow through. And then you start looking at the next level things. What are the things right in front of me? I remember even for me, I did not eat fruits and vegetables very much. I liked fruits and vegetables, but I didn’t know how to cook. I was a drive-through baby. If we weren’t in the drive-through, we were at a buffet. That’s the only two places we ever ate. My mama worked a bajillion jobs. There wasn’t no, my mom sitting around, coming home each night and cooking a dinner. If she wasn’t working a bajillion jobs, she worked one job 70, 80 hours a week to put food on the table so she could get that overtime and stuff. So we just ate out all the time. That’s all we had time for.
Corinne:
I didn’t know how to cook when I lost my weight I didn’t even know how… Here’s what I knew to do with a chicken. If I didn’t want it to be dry, I boiled it in water. I’m talking about going and buying chicken tenders. I remember making Chris eat for a while, like, all right, I’m going to start cooking. I had it in my head I was going to become a… I wanted to be someone who could actually cook. The first few iterations of chicken with him was, well, I boiled it in water so it wouldn’t be dry. And I was afraid that I would under cook it and we’d all die. But I knew if I boiled it, I could do it. Tasteless as fuck, but we survived.
Corinne:
So for me one of the things that I realized was that the first version of me was not giving up eating out. I thought that if I lost all my weight, I probably would be somebody who cooked and I probably would learn all that stuff. And we would eat more fruits and vegetables and we would be doing all those things. But me today, the first version of me had to be able to go out to eat and not stuff herself. So when I was like, what can I do today to make weight loss easier? Well, I still need to be able to go out to eat. So let’s take IHOP as a good example. We’d go to IHOP, I’d get the big meat lover’s omelet, I’d get pancakes, butter, sour cream. That’s what I would always eat.
Corinne:
So as I was losing weight, I was like, what could I do to make weight loss easier today? Where am I at? The first thing I literally did was quit putting butter on my pancakes. Just get rid of the butter. The next thing I did a week or two later, I tried pancakes without syrup. I was at fucking IHOP. I thought, well, I wonder what one without syrup tastes like. Let me just tell you. It’s like cake batter, pretty fucking sweet. I was shocked beyond belief.
Corinne:
Then I switched out the omelet instead of getting the meat lovers, I got one meat. Then one day I got all brave with myself and was like, maybe I don’t even need the pancakes. Maybe I just want the omelet. And I could do like toast and jelly. That is how you evolve the version of me now doesn’t even go to IHOP anymore. Number one, we ain’t got one close. But number two, if I’m going to have pancakes, I now make the pancakes. I didn’t even know how back then, but over time I started layering little things in. So you have to ask yourself, is this sustainable? If it’s not sustainable, that doesn’t mean you quit it today. It means you start trying to figure out, all right, so what is going to be sustainable for me?
Corinne:
If I wasn’t terrified I couldn’t lose weight. If I wasn’t sitting around thinking I’m a terrible person, because I’m overweight, what would I be doing to lose weight? How would I set this up? If I didn’t think I needed to be punished for being overweight, those are some of the things to ask yourself. Most of the time, the majority of us are not picking things that are sustainable simply because we’re just afraid we can’t lose… This is what kills me. I teach the easiest way to lose weight of all. It’s just like, we’re just going to sit around, we’re going to think about this. We going to make some common sense fucking decisions and that’s what we’re doing.
Corinne:
No more math, no more complicated, no more deprivation and restriction. And my people lose weight just fine. But here’s what’s hilarious. People will tell me, a lot of you who listen to the podcast and stuff will say, “Well, I haven’t really been able to follow the easy stuff so I’m going to go and for a little while, I’m going to do this really extreme boot camp. That requires a lot of my time, wears me out physically and where they put me on a very strict diet, because I just need lots of rules.”
Corinne:
I’m like, “Are you fucking telling me that I’m sitting here telling you how to do it simple and easy and all you got to do is get better at understanding yourself, that if you had a lot more rules, that felt really restrictive and depriving, you had to go and spend more time doing it, that’s my answer. I bet I’ll be way more successful over there.” No, you won’t. Are you fucking kidding me? It’s like, if you can’t do something that’s common sense and basic, this is the thing, don’t convince yourself that you need something. It’s like, well when I am learning how to have a better relationship with food, I overeat sometimes. So I should really do something that takes all my favorite foods away because I will do better there.
Corinne:
It’s like, no, you’ll feel like ass over there, then the first time, the first time somebody offers you something that you love, you don’t know how to think about it. All you got is your old memories of I always overeat that, I’m scared of that food. I’m never… It’s like, oh God, here I am. That food controls me. Food does not control anybody. Food does not have that kind of power. It’s not talking to you. The last time I walked into my pantry, I didn’t have a bad day and say, “Hey chips, can you just sit on the couch and talk to me?”
Corinne:
Now I might eat chips and tell myself that chips helped me, but they really didn’t. I got my mind off my troubles by eating. I got distracted, but the food didn’t do anything to me. It didn’t do anything for me either. That was all happening in my brain. So it’s really important that you guys think about the sustainability aspect of it. Because if you’re already doubting now that you could… If you can’t do it after you’ve… If you don’t see yourself still doing it after you lose weight, chances are you won’t even get yourself the opportunity to even try, at some point you’ll break. So you want to set things up to do it in a way that you can live the rest of your life.
Corinne:
The next thing is called hedonic conditioning. This is very common right now. You are halfway through the first month. This is the most common thing I hear all the time is Corrine, I don’t get it. January one. I was so motivated, that first week I had flames shooting out of my ass I was so motivated. If I sneezed there was confetti coming out. I was so excited about this weight loss program. Here I am three weeks later, not so excited, not so motivated. It’s kind of boring and I’m catching myself wishing I was doing something else. I’m wanting to just take a break because I’ve been so good since January one. This is where we have hedonic conditioning come in. Most people think when they’re not motivated and they’re not excited that something’s going wrong.
Corinne:
The way your brain works is that the first week or two, it’s pretty exciting. But your brain is supposed to normalize to things. It is supposed to make things really just mundane. It’s kind of like for all of you, for all of my mothers out there the very first time your child says mama, you flip out. You’re like, “Oh my God, I hope I recorded this for grandma, everybody needs to know the baby just said my name. Where’s Facebook, where’s my Instagram?” You’re fucking excited. Cut to seven years later on a Wednesday afternoon, they’ve come home from school. You’re trying to do something. And here’s what you’re hearing, mama, mama, mama, mama. You’re pretty fucking conditioned. You wish they would just quit saying your name. You’re not going like, “Oh my God, did you see my baby? He’s seven years old still saying my name like a champ.”
Corinne:
No, you get used to it. It’s like the first time your partner says I love you. You’re like swoon, where’s my fainting couch. Oh my God, let me text my bestie. 20 years in. They say I love you and you’re like, “What do you want?” You must want something. That is hedonic conditioning. The same thing happens with a weight loss program. Even my glorious, No BS one, a lot of y’all started with the big workshop on January 2nd. You’re hustling your way through No BS, watching our goal getter gauge rise, hoping you going to get the prizes and stuff. And some of y’all are just like, “Ugh, good Lord. I don’t know if I can listen to that bitch say one more word. I’m just halfway through. How many more times she going to tell me my old shitty thinking is the only problem I got.” That’s just normal. You have to normalize that.
Corinne:
And this is important for weight loss, write this down because when you lose weight, all of it, we have to practice being normalized to things that are happening. Because one day you’re going to lose all your weight and yep, you’re going to be thrilled. You’re going to step on that scale and be like, “Hot damn, I’ve never seen 150. What the fucks even happening in my world? I can’t believe it. This is great.” People are going to be like, “Oh my God, you’ve lost so much weight. Tell me what you did. What’s the name of that podcast? Losing 100 Pounds With Corinne, I’m going to go download that. This is amazing.”
Corinne:
Then they normalize to your new weight. Nobody gives a shit that you’ve lost weight. Nobody asks you about what you did about a month later. The only time anybody notices if you lost weight is if they ain’t seen you in two years. Guess what else happens? You get on the scale day in and day out there ain’t no confetti, 150’s not new. Now what happens, you jumping on the scale and you’re getting 150 and every day you’re like, “I hope I can keep that shit off. Last time I weighed 150 I gained it back.” That’s hedonic conditioning. You normalize to the newness. Your goal is to realize you’re not supposed to be motivated all the time. You’re supposed to normalize things. And then you listen to your brain and you tell yourself what you need to hear so that you feel determined, willing, committed, up to for the challenge for the day.
Corinne:
Or you just do it even if you don’t want to, you’re now going to do it because you said you would, it’s not as exciting. Y’all will all lose weight the more you quit relying on being highly motivated. You will lose weight when you go quit relying on everything needing to be a fucking thrill. You’ll lose weight when you now rely on challenging yourself, learning how to highlight what’s working, how to leave an imprint every single day on yourself about how you can make weight loss easier, how you are changing in the smallest of ways.
Corinne:
So much of weight loss is about the little things. It’s not about the big things. It’s about all these little things. So for all of my No BS women, when we get to module four of No BS so much more of that’s going to be covered. So make sure you don’t lose momentum, keep going. You don’t get unmotivated to finish the goal getters guide this month to finish mission possible because you want to make sure that you teach yourself how to keep going when enthusiasm and motivation wains, because it’s always going to happen. It’s normal and a part of the process, nothing has gone wrong. This is just called where we actually dig in and we really get to work. The last thing is, is get back up. If you did start on January one, it is January 18th, 2022. You do not throw in the towel. You do not piss all over yourself and take a dump in your bed and twirl in it because you’ve messed up. You get back up. If you picked the wrong weight loss program for you, try my free course, try my podcast.
Corinne:
If you’re a No BS woman and things aren’t going perfectly, make it more doable. Go back through module one and listen into doable planning one more time. Check in, are you planning because it’s doable, are you planning things you think you should be doing? Big difference. All right, I’m going to do some questions. Y’all are like, hey, look at your hair. Some of y’all haven’t seen me in a while. All right, let’s go to questions. I start off the day good. I have trouble with mindless eating in the evenings. That’s not a question. Just kind of a blanket statement. The biggest thing that I would do is go listen to the podcast. If you’re not a No BS member, then I would go and listen to the podcast. We have plenty of podcasts on mindless eating at night. If you are a No BS member, you need to listen to module three where we’re discussing overeating and urges. We have a lot of references in there to nighttime eating.
Corinne:
For all of my members who are going through No BS right now, as you go through each module what’s going to happen is you are going to be illuminated a problem that you have. So the way the program works is that you take the lessons and you do the things, and then it’s spotlights where your overeating patterns are. And it spotlights the parts of your weight loss that are hard for you. And that’s how you know what to do next. So if you are still having trouble with mindless eating in the evening, I would suggest finishing No BS. And then I would go to Urges 2.0 inside the membership. Urges 2.0 is all about urges. It’s all about, we talk about those overeating windows in there. There are some calls where you can do some of the worksheets where you sit with some of your favorite foods where you consciously plan and try different things in order to make those urges not have control over you.
Corinne:
How can you get a grip on weight loss when you eat because you are sad and eat for comfort. So we have a lot of podcasts on that. This is where Alicia, the best way you get a grip is you first have to understand what is it that you tell yourself? I eat for comfort usually means I don’t have the skill to comfort myself when I’m sad, when I’m upset, when I’m lonely, when I’m disappointed. So that goes back to, for all of my No BS women and Alicia in case you’re a No BS woman, that’s going to be in module two of No BS. And if this is you, where you notice I emotionally eat, I use food as a way to take my mind off my problems. A lot of us use food to distract ourselves from our problems. We use food to distract ourselves from our feelings.
Corinne:
You want to do module two, and you want to follow that up with Thoughts 2.0, that would be the next program that you would go into. So let me just tell you a little bit about this. What a lot of us do is that when we’re sad, lonely, bored, whatever feelings are happening, we’ve not really been taught to ask ourselves what’s going on in my mind that’s causing this so that I can take a look at it and I can understand why I’m feeling the way that I do. We’re not taught usually as adults, we think that the reason why I’m sad is because so and so said something to me. The reason why you’re sad is because so and so said something, then I thought something about that. So inside of my brain, if I feel sad about what so and so said, it’s because I’m thinking they must not love me, or I’m so unlovable that they would say something like that, or it must be true if other people are saying it, then that must be true and that makes me sad.
Corinne:
So when you understand that first and foremost, your feelings are coming from your own brain. That also means that your answers, your solutions to feeling better, to feeling compassion for yourself also comes from your own brain. And for all of you who are inside of No BS, this is what relationships camp is going to be all about in the end of March. So make sure you’re signed up for that. But one of the things that we have to fundamentally understand is that when we know and are willing to take the ownership that our thinking is what causes our feelings, then we also own and take the responsibility for knowing how to feel better for ourselves, how to think differently for ourselves. And when you do that, what happens is so and so says something, I have a thought, I feel sad.
Corinne:
What you end up doing when you have that mindset is you ask yourself in this moment, what do I really need? Do I need understanding of my thinking? Do I need to reassure myself that I’m okay, I’m safe. Do I need to tell on myself, they’re wrong about me? Here are the things that I am starting to believe about me because in that moment, you don’t need the food if you’re doing that. But if you don’t have the skill of looking inside of your thinking, you don’t know how to do that and do it on a regular basis what ends up happening is, oh, so and so said something. I feel terrible, where are the donuts? Where’s the pantry? Let me go look for my answers inside the refrigerator.
Corinne:
As one of my members who lost a lot of weight said she one day realized she was listening to my content, she’s doing the things I said, she went to the fridge on a bad day to get something to eat. And she opened up the doors and she said, “Tanya, the answer to your sadness is not inside these doors right now. They are inside your heart and your head.” And she closed the refrigerator and she went to her living room and she sat down. She thought about, what do I really need in this moment? Sometimes as women, we just need to cry. Sometimes we just need to say this is a hard time for me and that’s okay.
Corinne:
Sometimes we need to have an honest conversation with ourselves and with somebody else, but just even acknowledging what we need helps you not go back to the pantry and back to the fridge, time and time again, to seek answers that will never be found. Every time I try to start something, the people that I love start to aggressively offer me all the worst foods they know I love. Why do they do that? Renee, it’s not a spike in offering. It’s when you’re trying to lose weight, you notice more that people are offering food. That’s all that’s happening. I guarantee you, if you track it over a year, the people you love are probably offering you that food. It’s just sometimes during the year you give a shit and sometimes during the year you just take it. You’re like, “Yeah, that looks good. Thanks.”
Corinne:
And sometimes it’s like, holy shit I’m trying to lose weight, why are you doing that? It’s not them, it’s your brain. When you are trying to lose weight, your brain turns up the volume to notice things that are either going to get in your way or notice the things that you love more. Especially for a lot of you, let’s say you go on a diet and you tell yourself, “Well I can’t eat bread. I can’t have carbs.” The week before when you were eating pizza and bread and all the things you weren’t noticing them everywhere. You were just doing it.
Corinne:
The second you tell yourself you can’t have it… This is how I know this happens. I remember every diet I ever started. I wouldn’t notice any Burger King commercials, Pizza Hut commercials and stuff. If I was just eating shit and wasn’t trying to lose weight, I didn’t pay attention to commercials. I’d just wait for the show to come back on. Let Corrine start a diet and I would sit there and be like, “Ah, I don’t know why every commercial has to be about food. This is some bullshit.” I’d get pissed.
Corinne:
And McDonald’s and Burger King and Pizza Hut did not know that Corrine started diet and then gave the local station more money to put on commercials while I was watching. But we tell ourselves shit like that. How do I know I am eating enough? I’m afraid I’m eating too little because I’m still working on the hunger and satisfied feelings. This is the thing. You just decide that I’m eating enough and if I’m not, I bet I’ll get hungry in an hour or two. This is enough. I bet if it’s not, I’ll notice, I’ll notice things in my body, right now I’m just going to decide this is plenty because there’s no sense in being afraid of it.
Corinne:
Worst case scenario you eat. It’s just like a while ago I ate breakfast before I started this call. Because I don’t have a break again until 4:00 today. I literally am on call straight till 4:00 today. And so I was like, all right, I’m going to go ahead and eat some breakfast, but I didn’t sit there and be like, well, I don’t know if this is enough breakfast. Maybe I’m going to get hungry. I don’t know if this will be enough. I just ate some breakfast and told my myself we’ll eat again at 4:00 and I bet it’ll be okay.
Corinne:
Just telling yourself okay, I’m going to see. Right now I’m just going to decide this is plenty, and if it’s not, my body will tell me. And if my body says it’s not, the next time I eat, I’ll eat a little more, but in a few weeks, I’ll have it all figured out. So that’s just really what you got to tell yourself, Leann is in a few weeks I will have it all figured out. Can I follow your plan and use My Fitness Pal at the same time to be aware of calorie intake? No, no. Why? The whole point of my plan is to quit using external apps that have nothing to do with your brain and your stomach to tell you that you’re doing okay. The point of my program is for you to learn how to listen to your body and for your brain to assure you, to reassure you, to applaud you, to think.
Corinne:
I am not a believer in calorie counting apps. Now for some of y’all when you join, it don’t matter how many times I tell y’all quit counting them fucking points. Quit counting them macros, quit counting them thing. If you want to keep doing it, fine, but all you’re doing is reassuring the part of you that thinks you don’t know what you’re doing, that you need this in order to tell you. I had done calorie counting several times in my past. And here’s the problem with counting calories. Number one, you’re going to have days you’re not that fucking hungry.
Corinne:
All of us have them. You’ve gone through your life and had days where you’ve been real busy. You haven’t been that hungry, your adrenaline overrode the system. But we’ve all also been on diets where we did have a busy day and we didn’t eat and we end the day with like, oh my God, I got like 1300 calories. Now let me over eat at dinner because I got 1300 calories. So now what I’m going to do is I’m going to stuff myself, like a Thanksgiving turkey, be miserable, override my body that’s saying I don’t need any more food right now.
Corinne:
Then you’re going to have days too, where it’s like, here I am on a day where I’m extra hungry. I got hormones. Maybe my stress levels are up, my body’s working extra hard. Maybe I’ve had some tough workouts, whatever it may be. Maybe you had three days at the office where y’all were moving furniture, packing boxes and doing all kinds of stuff and you ain’t used to doing all that. You used to just being on your ass doing nothing. Well then your body wants fuel. But My Fitness Pal is like, oh no, bitch, you get 1400 calories a day. What do you mean you want to eat 1700.
Corinne:
Then we do the mind fuck. It’s like, oh, I’m going to gain weight. I can never stick in my calories. I’m always going to have to be hungry on diets. This is how all that shit starts. So my answer is just don’t. Learn to trust you, learn to read your body’s signals. We were all put on this earth with a brain and a functioning stomach for a reason, to make sure we can stay alive. The problem is that we’re overriding our body’s natural signals when we extreme diet. And when we just say, fuck it, I’m going to do whatever I want. The point is to stop trying to override your body and put your trust into something else.
Corinne:
I’ve lost 50 pounds, but now I have all this ugly saggy skin. How do I get rid of that? Toni, all right, first of all, I lost 100 and I had loose skin. The first thing you got to get rid of is your shitty attitude about your loose skin. I don’t care, the only way you going to get rid of loose skin is go have some surgery. There’s only so much tightening up you can do with loose skin, with weights, water, and body scrubs. And it’s going to make a minimal impact. Y’all don’t sit there and ask me about body scrubs. Just go buy you one, like get you some olive and sugar. That’s a body scrub or go buy one over the counter. There’s no magic ones out there. Y’all trust me.
Corinne:
If there was legit creams and potions that took care of all the loose skin, don’t you think me and Oprah would have it. Here’s my solemn promise to every woman out there. If there ever is a pill that actually will help you lose weight without it being a mind fuck, and terrible for your health or a scrub or a lotion that will tighten up all your skin, I will be the first to tell you all about it. And I will say it every single day and twice on Sunday for you, but they’re not out there. Here’s what we do have to do though. When it comes to loose skin for all of you, number one, most women like 96% of women are going to have sags, loose skin, crepe, and all the things, that’s called a human body. 4% of women in the world are going to look ideal, 4%.
Corinne:
At some point you got to quit talking to yourself like an asshole, Toni, after you’ve lost 50 pounds, because you’re comparing yourself to a 4% standard. And this is what I had to do, Toni, is I would sit around and I would think so much about, well, I’ve lost a 100 pounds, talk about hedonic conditioning. I’ve lost 100 pounds, but I got loose skin. I lost 100 pounds, but I sure didn’t look the way I thought I would. I guarantee you every woman on here. If I said hey, I’m going to just snap my fingers and you’re going to have your goal weight. You’d all be like, I would be thrilled. Can this just happen? You would be thrilled for a minute. And then you would condition. And then if you are in the habit of picking yourself apart, worrying, thinking your body’s not good enough, it doesn’t matter if you’re small or you’re big. You will carry that exact type of thinking to whatever size you weigh.
Corinne:
You’ll feel good for a little bit, but then you’ll flip back to it’s not good enough. It’s not good enough. I thought it would be better. You will drive your feelings. You’ll make yourself feel sad, disappointed, all the things that you do when you weighed 200 pounds, you’ll have that same kind of feeling and those same kind of thoughts at 150, because you will condition to what you weigh. But if you don’t learn how to redirect your thinking, how to change your self concept, you’re just going to be thinking the same things, feeling the same things in a smaller body. And y’all know it happens. There’s not a single person in here who’s not lost weight and then sat there and was still afraid to weigh. It’s like the second I hit goal weight, it wasn’t like, oh my God, I hit goal weight, 150 pounds. I can’t wait to weigh every day now. This is going to be amazing. After a few weeks I dreaded getting on the scale because I would worry, what if it’s gone up? What if it goes up a pound?
Corinne:
What if I gain two pounds on my period? Notice how, if I worried about the scale on the way down, then I will worry about the scale at my goal weight too. So Toni, here’s what I want you to do. I want you to think about this. It is okay for me to not like my loose skin, but I’m never going to call it ugly again because that just makes me feel terrible. I’m just going to say I have loose skin versus I have ugly loose skin. That’s one level up right there.
Corinne:
Number two. Sometimes I’m disappointed my loose skin, but here are the ways that I’m proud of myself. Here are all the things that are so much better in my life right now. This is what we forget. It’s like when we’ve lost weight, there are so many things to be proud of. So many things that are better. This morning, someone left a post inside of our Facebook group thanking me. She was like, “Corinne, I flew two years ago and I had to ask for were the seatbelt extender.” And she heard that thing pulled out and she was like, “Never again. I got to get on this plane knowing I was going to fit in the seat. The seatbelt was going to buckle, and I would be comfortable.”
Corinne:
Those are the kinds of things you have to remind yourself of. It’s like, for me, I’m like, yeah, I’ve got loose skin, but every single time I get on a airplane and I cross my legs. I’m like, “This body can cross its legs now.” Every time that I go out for a walk and I walk faster than my husband, I’m like, “This body with this loose skin can walk faster than my husband.” When I weighed 250, I’d have to ask him to slow down because I’d get out of breath and couldn’t keep up when we would go to the store. So it’s like reminding yourself of those things.
Corinne:
It’s okay. I would love for all of us to fall in love with our bodies, with all the imperfections and everything. I think that that’s totally possible. I have worked really hard. I still have days though that… This morning got, up very tired today. I was like, “You know what? Today’s just going to be a walk day. I just am not going to run. I’m not going to do anything.” Went out to my gym. I was in my shorts. I was walking and I decided after I walked for a few minutes. So I was like, “I’m going to do a nice long stretch.” As I was laying there, I was looking at my legs. And the first thing my brain was thinking was God, they’re so dimply. The scars and the loose skin. they’re probably never going to look any better.
Corinne:
And I was like, yeah, they may not look any better. But then I said, “And I also really love that I have solid habits. That I’m the kind of person on my tired day, I walk on my treadmill for 30 minutes and listen to self development.” So I equaled out what was going on in my head. I didn’t just allow myself… All Right if I can’t have it all, then I’m just going to obsess over this one part that’s terrible and let it just drag me down.
Corinne:
If you only eat when you’re hungry, what do you do when you are on a tight schedule? As a teacher I have 10 minutes in the morning and 20 minutes in the day. Neither time am I really hungry but eat just because. It’s not a problem, Wendy. Usually what happens with all of my teachers, I’m kind of the same way, even though I know I work from home, but I will tell you on some days when I’m filming, every week I got meetings and stuff. I have days where I’m not going to have an opportunity to eat. I just make sure like… So you can make sure that your dinner is that it’s light enough to where when you wake up in the morning that you’re hungry or you eat a really small breakfast. If you know that you’re not going to… Let’s say that you start school at 7:00 AM and your lunch for your kids is not until 1:00.
Corinne:
And that’s when you get your 20 minute break. Then at 7:00 you’re going to eat just enough to carry you through to 1:00. That will just take some playing around with. And then you set yourself up so by the time you get to 1:00 that you are hungry or that you’re just starting to get hungry or that you know it’s been enough time to where if your adrenaline… This is what happens for some of you. It’s not that you’re not hungry, but you’ve got, a lot of you stress yourselves out and you worry so much about things and that you stay so jacked up that when you have your 20 minute break to eat, your adrenaline can’t come down fast enough to empty for your hunger signals to be louder than your adrenaline. When your adrenaline and stress levels are running high, your body purposely tamps down hunger.
Corinne:
That’s why on a day like today where I’m real busy, like the last three weeks I didn’t eat until 3:00 or 4:00 in the afternoon because I woke up, I was busy. I was doing things I’d roll right into a call. Next thing you know I was on all the calls. I honestly wouldn’t get hungry until the calls died down. And that was just because adrenaline had kicked in. And I think a lot of us that work, that’s a common phenomenon. So what you can do is you can number one, just eat a little bit during those windows. And that’s fine. You can also work on listening to how you talk to yourself so that by the time you get to your afternoon eating window, you’re not going in so jacked up mentally that you’re like listening for opportunities of when can I calm myself down during the day?
Corinne:
When am I worrying about something? I have no control over? When am I worrying about what other people think instead of being like, I don’t even know what they’re saying in their heads. So if I’m not hearing it, I probably shouldn’t be imagining worst case scenario of what people are thinking. Those are some of the things to watch out for so that when you get to lunch, your adrenaline’s not so high so that you can be hungry when you get there. That’s just a couple things.
Corinne:
All right, y’all that’s it. That’s all we got time for today. Get one hour, once a month. Y’all make sure that you take the free course, NoBSfreecourse.com, that you share the podcast, Losing 100 Pounds With Corinne, go to Apple iTunes, download it and subscribe. Make sure that you’re sharing it. Please tag me on social. If you find a podcast you love take a screenshot of it, post it on your social, tag me. I would love to see your comments and stuff on it. Otherwise, y’all I will see you next month. Third Tuesday, 9:00 AM Central Time. Have a good one, y’all, bye-bye
