October 21, 2022

Episode 290: Why You NEED New Thinking As You Lose Weight

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So many of y’all listen to the podcast and think, “Preach, Corinne. All your shit makes all the sense in the world.”

But by the time dinner rolls around, you’re back to feeling out of control and eating like it’s your last supper.

This isn’t because you’re broken and doomed to battle your weight for the rest of your life. It’s because you haven’t started thinking like the version of you who loses weight. You’re thinking like the old version of yourself who has tried and failed more diets than you can count.

I don’t blame you. Those diets have set you up for failure.

But as someone who has helped 1000s of real women lose weight, I’ll tell you, the key to weightloss is changing what goes on in between your ears so you can control what goes into your mouth.

If we’re going to lose weight, we can’t keep thinking like our “old selves” and wondering why it’s not helping us lose weight.

Listen to Episode 290: Why You NEED New Thinking As You Lose Weight to learn the 2 thoughts you must stop NOW (because they’re hosing your weight loss).

Transcript

Hello everybody, welcome back. So today, I want to talk to you about why you need some new thinking for this new life you’re going to create for yourself with weight loss.

I was actually doing a Peloton run. So one of the things that I am determined as fuck this year to do is to finally run a 5K in under 35 minutes. It was one of those goals I set for last year. I started on it, then I decided, “Oh, I want to train for a half marathon.” Lost interest in that and basically just did not really focus on it, because I wasn’t even identifying as a runner anymore.

I was talking to my best friend about it. And often she would hear me say Last year, “I’m so slow. Well, I’m not really good at running.” I would just talk about running as if everything I was telling you was the God’s honest truth. This is just the way it is. And so, when I was thinking about this year, I was like, “I so want to just be able to go do 5Ks anytime I want and to finish in under 35 minutes. It’s important to me.”

And as I was telling my friend Jane about it, she was like, “Well, the one thing you’re going to have to do is you’ve got to start thinking more like a runner and stop thinking like someone who’s trying to run. Stop thinking like someone who’s slow. Stop thinking like someone who doesn’t have time to get her workouts in.” She was like, “You don’t have to kill yourself to get a sub 35, but you definitely have to quit assing around and deprioritizing it, getting distracted, calling yourself slow and all these other things.” I was like, “Oh, you’re fucking right.”

I had committed that I’m going to do this. And so, I’ve been doing Peloton runs. I was telling Jane… If y’all don’t know, my best friend, Jane, she is such an athlete, she qualified for Kona this year. She’s in the middle of training for the Kona Ironman. She just is a beast.

And so, I was like, “Well, I’m going to do three Peloton runs a week. I’m going to run on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays. Or Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. Basically, I’m going to run every other day and I’m not going to kill myself like I normally do, because that’s usually why every time I’ve ever set this goal, I get really excited in the beginning. The next thing I know, I’m running all the time, I’m no longer lifting weights, my shoulders start looking like shit. I talk myself out of running, so that my shoulders don’t look like shit.” And she was like, “Just start with those three runs. But you have to decide, ‘I am now doing three runs a week,’ and how would a runner think about that?” And I was like, “Well, they would just think they show up for it.” So she gave me some really good advice.

And so, here I am. It was Saturday. I’m doing a 45 minute walk-run. They have some really cool classes, where you can walk and run. And I really like them because as of right now, that’s what is best for my body. It really helps me to work on running a little bit faster, but also giving my knees and my hips the needed break to be able to regroup.

So Kirsten Ferguson is my favorite. She’s the Ratchet Mom’s Club. Hands down, my favorite classes. So I’m doing this class. And she does these mantras. She’ll do gospel music. They’re very inspirational. Now, she likes her hip-hop and her nasty rap too. But her Sunday runs, she’s very… And this was a replay of a Sunday run, but she’s always trying to be uplifting and give us positive things to think and mantras and our messages. And one of the things that she said was, “You have to get new keys for the new opportunities you’re going to create for yourself.” And I sat there and thought about this and I was like, “This is just like weight loss. If we’re going to create a new life for ourselves, if we’re going to create a new way to be around food, a new way to live in our body and stuff, we can’t keep recycling our old thinking and wondering why it’s not helping us lose weight. We have to have those new keys. We have to have those new thoughts.”

And so, I was thinking about this because you might be a podcast listener and half the time you’re just like, “Preach, Corinne. You’re saying the things. I totally agree. All your shit makes all the sense in the world,” but you find yourself thinking more about what I’m saying, but you don’t see yourself really doing it, or you don’t see yourself doing it consistently.

And so, when you’re finding yourself just kind of doing the things I talk about and spending more time wondering if it might work, or thinking, “This sounds great, but you know me, I lose slow. But you know me, I’m addicted to sugar. But you know me, I’ve never been able to lose weight before,” we have to address this. Because so many of you who listen to this podcast, you are really ready for your new life. You are so ready to lose your weight. You are so ready to put this all behind you. There’s all of that.

And yet, you’re hesitant because there’s a difference between being ready for the result of weight loss, being ready for the life, being ready for everything that you think comes with it, and being ready for the work that is required to get the new life. And this is where I see most of us getting hung up. It’s like, “I really want it.” People tell me this all the time. They’ll say, “Corinne, I really want to lose weight. I just don’t know why I’m not doing it.” Because you really want the weight loss, what you’ve got to also want is the work involved.

So there’s a couple of ways to attack this. And a lot of this is the stuff that we do inside the No BS Weight Loss membership, where I do all of the thought work stuff with you. Because one of the things that I tell people all the time is, “We all want to lose weight. That’s not our issue. No one’s really taught us how to want the process to go along with it.” If you have a lot of diet trauma, if you have been on a bajillion diets in your past and they caused…

Let’s say you did a diet that took away all your favorite foods, so you spent most of your time not going out with your friends for dinner, saying no to invitations, being afraid to go on vacations, terrified of the holidays and stuff, you end up with some diet trauma there, because your brain remembers the suffering that was involved. And that is one of the biggest issues, is trauma. We don’t want the process of weight loss. So many of us have just been through so many traumatic diets, where we either couldn’t go out. The diets were just so restrictive on what you could eat that you literally just couldn’t go places, unless you just sat there, which is fine. But for many of us, it’s not fine. That’s not the life we want. Most of us are losing weight so that we can go out and we can have a normal meal without eating our fucking face off. So if you’re doing a diet that restricts you from even being able to go out, you’re not getting the life you want. And so, we have all this diet trauma.

What ends up happening is our brain makes an association that anytime you’re trying to lose weight, that equals suffering. Because if you’re like most people, the only diets you’ve ever done in the past all equated suffering. So that’s why a lot of us have a hard time wanting the process. We are taking what I tell you to do in the podcast, I want you to think about this, you’re taking what I talk to you in the podcast, or you’re taking… Let’s say you become a member and you take what I teach you in the membership that goes so much deeper than the podcast and you look at it and you’re like, “This all makes sense. This seems so easy. This is what I really want.” And yet, for some reason, you’re having a hard time pulling the trigger.

I promise you, one of the reasons why you can’t pull the trigger is because of that past diet trauma. That old thinking, where your brain is trying to use its old experience and apply it to a new one. It’s thinking, “You’re going to lose out on your social life.” It’s thinking, “You know you’re going to have to be so hungry that it’s going to be miserable.” A lot of us have done diets. We did shots, those HCHG shots, where you could only eat 500 or 800 calories a day, where you literally are starving. Your body remembers that stuff. We’ve done diets where we cut out all of our favorite foods. Everybody has done some bullshit diet in the past that required so much work and so much suffering, that any time going forward it’s hard to want the process because your brain automatically assumes it’ll be like the last time, even if I’m telling you, “We are doing things completely different.”

So one of the things that we have to do is we got to want the process. So we have to unlearn old thinking that we have. So you have to get good at understanding, “What do I think it means for me to do what Corinne says?” Because a lot of you will realize that your brain is going to bring up, “Well, if you start doing what she says, it’s just going to be really hard at night. You’re going to be so hungry,” which is not what I teach. I teach y’all to eat to enough. And if you eat to enough, that should last you for a few hours. If you eat to enough at six o’clock for dinner, your ass should be able to go to bed at 10 o’clock without starving. You have plenty to go around. You have plenty of food, because we ate to enough. You have plenty of stored calories on your body.

You may have cravings and urges to eat, because you always do. You may want to sit and wash your sad day down with the sleeve of Oreos, but just letting your brain know, “But we’re not starving, honey. We won’t be hungry like the last time.” And we have to learn to do those things.

So I was thinking about this whole concept. The first is wanting the process. The second part is there’s just thinking that we keep trying to use while we lose weight and wonder why we get hosed. So the two thoughts that I think I see people hang onto the most, that hose weight loss is number one, you really, really, really want to lose weight, but you keep thinking about your past failures. It’s like, “I want to start doing the things Corinne says in the podcast. I want to join the No BS membership. I want to do the basics. I want to learn how to stop my emotional eating. I want to really learn how to lose weight for the last fucking time, so I can live the life I really want.” But you spend more time thinking about how many diets didn’t work.

You talk to yourself all the time, but like, “I’m just not sure. You know when you did Susan Powter, that shit didn’t work. And remember when you tried keto? You hated it. And remember when you became a vegetarian? Your cat looked tasty every time they walked by.” When you hear that, you have to tell yourself, “That is the old me talking.” Those thoughts about your past diets are one of the biggest blockers to your future weight loss.

Because number one, it calms you into thinking, it lies to you that, “What you’re going to do next with No BS is like all the others. It’s going to resemble all of that.” I’m telling all of you, it’s not. We’re working on not being restricted. We’re working on learning how to deal with our life, not just lose weight. We’re working on so many things. I teach inside the No BS Weight Loss program all about food safety. So many of us don’t feel safe around foods and we have to learn food safety. We have to learn how to calm down the part of our brain that has had past diet trauma. These are the things that we have to overcome if we are going to step into the new version of us who loses their weight.

And so, hanging on to past failures and talking about them more than about what you’re going to do today, hoses today’s weight loss. You have to think about this, the future version of you that’s lost her weight, guess what she’s never thinking about anymore? All of her failed diets. The only time I ever think about failed diets, it is when I’m teaching you how to stop thinking about your failed diets. I don’t just sit around and be like, “Now that I’ve lost 100 pounds, let me keep recounting the ways of all the ways I failed.” No, the only reason why I lost weight was because every time I wanted to do that, I would tell myself, “Corinne, that is old Corinne thinking. And we’re not doing that today. New Corinne thinking doesn’t dwell on her past. She focuses in on what are we doing today that’s a little bit better than yesterday.” If I’m going to my past, the furthest I’m going back is to what the fuck did I do yesterday and what can I do better today?

The second one that comes up that I see that hoses people’s weight loss is your old excuses. A common one is that other people are going to suffer or, “I’ll have to be selfish to lose weight.” Look, you will never be excited and motivated to lose weight if you’re defining it as, “My kids will have to suffer, but I’m doing it anyway.” No, your kids do not have to suffer in order for you to lose weight. Just because you’re going to go on a walk, are your kids suffering? We have to really watch how we describe this shit. Otherwise, we don’t want the process. The other one is like, “I’ll have to be selfish in order to lose weight.” Says who? You can stop eating at enough and nobody in your life thinks you’re selfish. Nobody in your life thinks you’re suffering.

But we think these things because in the past, if you’ve done diets that require you to go to meetings, spend hours at the gym, and do all these things, it probably felt selfish. But that’s not what we’re doing this time. So this is one of the things I tell people all the time is, “Think about this, other people benefit when they get the best of me. And when I’m working on being the best version of me, everyone that I love gets to benefit from that.” Thinking about it like that is so much more effective and so much more useful than sitting around thinking about how other people are going to suffer.

So think about this today, I want you to think about when you listen to everything that I talk about in the podcast, when I give you all the things to lose weight, if you’re an No BS woman and you’re in the private membership and you’re taking the course and you’re thinking, “This all makes so much sense. No wonder I’ve been having a hard time. I really want to do this,” I want you to think, the process, “Do I have any thoughts that are still hosing me up though? Am I thinking it’s going to be hard? If so, what’s going to be hard about it?” Really look at it.

So often, we just assume things are going to be hard without actually detailing why we think it’s going to be hard. Seriously, if any of you are sitting around right now thinking that doing No BS is going to be hard, I want you to write down exactly why. “This is exactly why it’s going to be hard. Here are my 30 reasons why.” Really let your brain have its day. And then, look at all of it and ask yourself, “Is that even true?” So often, we don’t spend time questioning what we think. We question our abilities. We question our past. We question our decisions. We question lots of things, except for the one thing that’s the most useful to question, and that is how we think.

So I want to leave you on a little motivational note. Number one is I think it’s important for you to start paying attention to what is old you thinking and what is going to be the new you thinking. Try to catch old you thinking. Listen for it. It always sounds like shit. It’s going to drag you down. And then, what is going to be your new thinking? That helped me so much in my weight loss. And then, the second thing is a song that I think you’ll love that I got from Kirsten Ferguson’s class. It’s called I Didn’t Know My Own Strength by Whitney Houston. I highly encourage you to listen to it.

So go out there, find out that old thinking and that new thinking, and let’s start applying new thinking to that life that we want to create for ourselves. Y’all have a good week.

Ready to lose weight for the last damn time?

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I'm Corinne Crabtree

Corinne Crabtree, top-rated podcaster, has helped millions of women lose weight by blending common-sense methods with behavior-based psychology.

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Tried Everything to Lose Weight? I Did Too!

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