August 5, 2022

Episode 279: Getting Back on Track After a Binge or Overeat

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I was scrolling the No BS Private Facebook group and saw a post that said, “I had a binge today.”

Immediately I read it…word for word. Knowing overeating and binge eating are such shameful experiences for people, I wanted to get in and help.

The post was filled with what all of us think at times…

“Why did I do this when I know I want to lose weight?”

“I was doing so good, and out of nowhere, I’m eating all day.”

“The scale is fucking with me, and I don’t know if I can handle it.”

Whether you overeat or binge eat, you probably often feel confused, frustrated, or defeated afterward.

That’s normal. But, there’s hope.

You can also feel determined, refocused, and understanding too. And in today’s podcast, I’m helping you with the “Duality of Emotion.”

The Duality of Emotion is where you teach yourself to feel both sides of your story…instead of just one big, shameful ass version.

I take you step-by-step through the “I had a binge” post and share with you EXACTLY how I helped my No BS Member.

So, if you’ve ever binged or ate your face off wondering, “why the fuck do I do this…”

This is the podcast for you.

Episode 279: Getting on track after a Binge or Overeat.

Transcript

Corinne:

Hi, I’m Corinne. After a lifetime of obesity, being bullied for being the fattest kid in the class and losing and gaining weight, like it was my job. I finally got my shit together and I lost 100 pounds. Each week I’ll teach you no bullshit weight loss advice you can use to overcome your battle with weight. I keep it simple. You’ll learn how to quit eating and thinking like an asshole. You stop that and weight loss becomes easy. My goal is to help you lose weight the way you want to live your life. If you are ready to figure out weight loss, then let’s go.

Corinne:

Hello, everybody. Welcome back. Today we have a different kind of episode. It’s me and Kathy. And it’s one of those episodes where I was exercising, and as usual, I can’t help myself, but I’m diddling around in our private Facebook group, taking a ponder in between sets just to see-

Kathy:

Diddling.

Corinne:

Basically.

Kathy:

You’re just taking the pulse. That’s what you’re doing. Taking the pulse of the group.

Corinne:

Well, I can’t resist them. Talk about an urge. That is the urge I have yet to defeat in my life. But I do like to… For all the listeners, if you ever become a No BS woman, you will see me popping up in the Facebook group a lot. It’s for our private members only, but I like to stay engaged. I either will comment on things. Sometimes I’ll see several posts where people are asking the same question over and over again. And I’ll create a short 60 second video on the best way to tackle it. I like to be hands on. I don’t like shit to wait around and all that kind of stuff.

Corinne:

So I actually read a really good post today about something I think a lot of people go through in weight loss, number one, she tackles a few things that I think are important. I’m not going to share her name, but the reason why we’re doing this podcast today, and I literally sent Kathy a message this morning that said, read this post. We’re going to podcast. Just follow along. Because I had it mapped out in my head. I kept thinking, “Ooh, I want to tell her this.” And, “Ooh, I want to tell her this.” But when you’re at the gym trying to get it done, you’re not really in a position to be like, “Here, Kathy. Here are my high level notes.” [inaudible 00:02:19] talk about.

Kathy:

That’s all right. I’m good at following.

Corinne:

I was going to say, in usual fashion, Kathy’s a good sport and will offer her insights. And we both… I mean, we’ve worked together long enough now to where if I start talking about something, she knows exactly where I’m going. So it’ll be good. The other thing is, if you are a No BS woman, here’s what we are going to do. We are going to take today’s lesson. You will have already had it. So by the time this podcast finally releases, you will have already had it inside the membership. And what I’m going to do is have my team copy and paste the exact message that was posted in Facebook with the link. So that for all the No BS women, you will get it inside the private membership, inside your private member podcast, with the actual Facebook post, the link directly to it, and sooner than everyone else.

Corinne:

Plus I think the other thing that I really did love about this post that we will not be able to convey in the podcast is as of right now, there are over 30 comments from No BS women all with advice, how they’ve handled this situation, pointing out the wins this person is having that she didn’t see. And that is the power of community. I was so happy to go in there. I definitely want to lend my own expertise to this, but there was great feedback in there too. So we will do that for all of you, but for all my public listeners, this is kind of like a little behind the scenes, almost of shit that happens inside the No BS weight loss program.

Corinne:

All right. So here’s how the post starts. I had a binge today. I haven’t behaved this way in a while. I used to binge most days and far worse, but today was a lot. I drove home feeling confused by me, defeated, frustrated with myself and disappointed. I also felt determined to figure it out and not behave this way tomorrow. So the first thing I want to talk about is something that actually I’ve been thinking about a lot, which is duality of emotion. It is very common to be working on yourself. So if you’re a No BS woman, it’s super common to feel proud and disappointed of yourself at the same time. Here’s why this happens. Number one is you used to probably only feel disappointed when shit would happen, if you overate, if the scale went up, whatever happened, most of us are only used to feeling the negative side. Then you become a No BS woman and I teach you the power of your thoughts and how you can think differently.

Corinne:

And you start doing exercises on, well, what could I think in these moments when I normally beat the shit out of myself? And you listen to videos and take courses on how to think about the scale when it goes up and you do a lot of these things. Then what happens is an old behavior occurs like this person. She had a binge. She has not had one in a long time. She’s had worse ones, but in her mind, her brain went back to all of the thoughts that it used to think, because it only knows how to think like it used to. I want you to think about your brain. Your brain has two parts to it. It has the habit brain where memories are stored, old thinking patterns. That’s the part of your brain that says, “Hey, lungs. Time to breathe in. Time to breathe out.”

Corinne:

The habit brain has a huge job on its hands. It does about 95% of all of your thinking. And because it has to do so much when it comes to breathing and heart and how your organs are functioning and stuff, it tries to put as much as it can on habit thoughts, like, all right, you had a binge. You beat yourself up afterward. That’s what we’re going to do. You’ve not taught me how to do it any other way. So from now on every time this behavior occurs, I will just send up thoughts of, “You piece of shit.” And that’s just how it works. Then you come into No BS and we teach you about the other half of your brain, the reasoning side of your brain. Now we call it the other half. Although it only represents 5%. The reasoning brain’s got a very powerful job.

Corinne:

I always like to think of the habit brain is the workhorse. It is just work, work, work, work, work. Your reasoning brain is the one that comes online in the moments you need it. It is the deliberate part. It is the part that… It thinks about your future. It makes plans. It does complicated math. It does everything that’s not automatic. So think about it this way. Your reasoning brain is the one that you’re going to use to go on a trip, a place where you’ve never been before. You have to look at your GPS and you need to get shit together and you’re going to pay attention more because you’ve never been on these roads. You’re not just going to be driving lollygagging. If you go to work the same way every damn day, eventually you’re not even thinking about it. You just know which roads to go and you just automatically go there.

Corinne:

It’s like, you don’t have to think. You can be listening to self development. You can be talking away to people and you can get there. It reminds me of, Logan always knows if we go somewhere new, stop talking, because it’s really hard for me to navigate traffic when I’ve not been someplace. I used to take him to school, if we went on the usual routes, he could run that mouth all the way and no problems. But he always knew after watching me several times that if we went somewhere I had never been, and I was having to navigate traffic, I had told him several times, “Hey, stop talking. Let me concentrate.” And then when we get on the road and we’re going again, then you can talk. That was my reasoning brain. I was having to utilize that part. So I say all of this because when you’re in No BS, you’re learning how to use both sides.

Corinne:

So when you have a binge, the automatic side of your brain is always going to send up its old thinking. It’s not doing it because it’s true. It’s not doing it because that’s a fact that you’re a loser or that you’ll never get your shit together, or this is going to screw your weight loss up or anything. It literally has not been taught to think something different. So it has one thing it can think. It can’t generate new thinking. It does not know how. This is good news, because then what happens is we don’t have to feel so bad about ourselves when our old thinking comes up. So for a lot of things, like in this one, we had a No BS woman who felt all of her old emotion around the binge because her old thinking came up around it. But she also felt new emotion, which was determined, because what we have taught her over and over and over again, by saying it routinely, is that there’s always good information if you look for it whenever you have a binge or whenever you overeat.

Corinne:

That overeat or binge is just spotlighting that next weight loss step for you. It’s the thing that your past diets didn’t address for you. So in this case, she did what’s called a discovery worksheet, which is inside our membership. We encourage everyone when they overeat or binge to do a discovery worksheet, because of what it does is it starts asking you questions about the overeat. Why do you think it happened? What was going on that day? Just lots of really good questions asked in different ways to give you some insight as to why it might have happened. Because I promise all of you, overeating and binging is not happening because something’s wrong with you. That’s our habit brain. Our habit brain wants to make overeating and binging a personal problem. This is your morality, honey. This is like, what’s wrong with you? And that’s not it. it’s always triggered by something out there that causes us to feel something. And when we retool our thinking around it, we now remove the stimulus to need to eat over it. Do you want to add anything before we move on to phase two of this post?

Kathy:

So funny that at the very beginning of this podcast, you talked about how I usually know where you’re going, because before you ever said it, I wrote down under duality of emotion, habit versus intentionality. So that’s what happens. You talked about that habit brain. It’s always going back and it’s looking for what did we do in the past to help us through this situation? And that’s the low energy part of it. It takes more energy to be intentional, or you used the word deliberate, to think about new ways to think about what happened. So I love that you talked about that. You also said something that I wrote down that I’ve never thought of before. Corinne, you taught me something today.

Corinne:

What is that?

Kathy:

The habit brain doesn’t generate new thinking.

Corinne:

No.

Kathy:

It’s always just going to draw from the past and help you out in the least energy expensive way possible.

Corinne:

Yeah. And one thing you said that I want to point out, and just to contrast a little, you said the habit brain, when it’s offering up its old thoughts, it’s trying to help you. It is trying to help you, but I want you to all hear this. It sometimes doesn’t feel very helpful.

Kathy:

Right.

Corinne:

So just because it doesn’t feel helpful, like when it’s saying, “You fat cow. What are you doing?” When it’s just yelling at you like that, a lot of our habit brain voice, the way that it talks to us, y’all are getting a deep dive lesson on the habit brain today, comes from messaging we’ve heard over the years. So for a lot of you… I remember… God love my mother. She never, ever was intentionally trying to make me remember something terrible about myself for the rest of my life. But my childlike brain latched onto this moment. It will never… I can remember everything that was happening in the room. It was eating dinner at my grandparents’ house. And my mom worked the night shift. This was after we had moved to Nashville and I had gained a significant amount of weight.

Corinne:

My grandparents, because we didn’t have much food growing up, when we moved to Nashville, if I wanted a fucking cheeseburger for breakfast, my grandfather was like, I’m here for it. It wasn’t like they were trying to give me a weight problem for the rest of my life. They just wanted to love us. And that was one of the best ways that they knew how. And so I was eating one night my favorite meal my grandmother would cook. This was not fried chicken livers. That was the first favorite. But second favorite was she would make these minute steaks. Nothing fancy about this. Literally McCormick’s brown gravy mix. But it tasted wonderful to me. With mashed potatoes and green peas. Well, my mom had just woke up and probably smoking a cigarette and having some coffee before she went to work at night.

Corinne:

It was back when my mother smoked. She does not smoke anymore. But if you’ve ever worked graveyard, you know you’re cranky as fuck before you go to work. Your whole cycle is just messed up all the time. And I was getting seconds. And she got so mad at my grandmother and started yelling at her that she was making me fat. And that if I didn’t quit eating my face off, I think she said something along the lines like, she’ll always be fat. She’ll never get married. Totally, Mammy’s brain ran off to the races of how my life was going to be ended because I was having a second helping of mashed potatoes. Well of course, I started crying. My grandmother got wicked mad. It was a huge fight. Next thing I know my mom goes upstairs and I’m just sitting there, my habit brain’s cataloging all of it.

Corinne:

Those childlike memories. It wasn’t sitting there going like, yeah… Because you know when you’re young, you don’t have… My young brain wasn’t sitting there going, “Well, now this is not really a problem. Your mother is just tired, blah, blah, blah.” It doesn’t know how to do that. All it heard was, if you’re overeating, this is bad, and this is how you should talk to yourself. That’s the way you stop this, because your mother thinks that’s a good idea. Well, how do you think I talked to myself, y’all, for half my life about every time I would overeat? I would make it a catastrophe. Think about all the things that was never going to happen for me. I was never going to lose weight. That voice stayed there for years until I reconditioned it. So for a lot of you, your voice, your habit brain’s voice is shrill, yelling, mean, not nice, demeaning.

Corinne:

You need to know that your brain is still trying to help you. It’s trying to tell you in the best way possible, “Hey Corinne, I know you’ve got hopes, dreams, and goals. This looks like it’s out of alignment. Maybe we should ponder for a moment this overeating thing and see if it’s really beneficial.” That’s the message. It’s trying to get your attention that you’re acting in a way that doesn’t align with what you say with your reasoning brain you won’t.” It just doesn’t know how to say it that way. It only knows how to go, “Hey, fat cow. Get that mash potatoes out of your mouth or you’re never going to get married.” So it’s just important because I watch so many of our women not want to hear that voice anymore because they just believe all of it. And I want you to dig a little deeper even in the shrillest of voices.

Corinne:

What is it really trying to tell me? I know it’s trying to help me. What could it be trying to communicate to me? In a way that I’d love for it to retool how it talks to me and I can do that with my reasoning brain, but that doesn’t mean just because my brain’s acting the Jackass that I need to throw all the lesson away. All right. Next part she says, so on my way home from work, it’s a 45 minute drive, so I’ve got a lot of time to think. I began to try and figure out what the fuck happened. I did a search of overeat in the No BS replays and I landed on a binge better lesson. Listening to this particular one felt like I was meant to hear it at that moment. It was a lot of what I needed. I came home and in tears told my husband how my day had gone.

Corinne:

And discussing things with him, I told him the possibilities that I wrote on my discovery worksheet. And as I was talking to him, I realized I have been repressing feelings of frustration with my slow progress of weight loss. Well, what I deem as slow. I have been working on staying positive and focusing on all the positive changes I’ve made. However, in the back of my mind, I’ve been allowing the scale to fuck with me and not journaling or discussing it with anyone. So this is important. One of the things that a lot of the No BS women actually told her is, don’t stop recognizing what’s working for you. Just because you overeat, just because you have a binge, we can work on that while also continuing to be proud of what we’re doing, and what we’ve done, and what we plan to do. So often I watch people do this.

Corinne:

If I fuck up, now I have to erase all of it, and I’m starting over. It’s like I learned nothing. And y’all wipe away every success. That’s very dangerous to your self-esteem. You can mess something up and still be proud of what all the other things you did. You can be disappointed that you binged. You can be disappointed that you overate and understand why you’re disappointed. Why I planned to do this, and I didn’t. Just disappointed because I keep thinking, I shouldn’t do it. Whatever thoughts. You can be acknowledging all of that and feeling it while also giving yourself compassion to be, but here are the things I’m still doing right. You will lose more weight with compassion than you ever will with beat downs. And it’s super important, because I’m teaching inside of our new Maintenance course right now that you have to acknowledge your wins, or when you get to Maintenance, you will be there and you’ll be there scared, because you will not have told yourself what you’ve done right.

Corinne:

You will not have belief in your habits. You will have to build from the ground up in Maintenance to get to the point to where you can keep the weight off. And it’s so important, because I watch people do this. They just think they’re going to be so happy when they lose their weight. And they are. They’re happy with the number. They’re happy that they’ve lost the weight. But they also still sit around terrified they’re going to screw it up, because they’ve not been reinforcing what they’ve been doing right. For God’s sakes, if the scale goes up a pound, because it’s supposed to, because that’s how the body works, their brain automatically freaks out as if they’re losing control, because they never showed themself all the way, saying, here’s places you’re in control. Look, here’s another time you were in control. It’s really important if you want to keep weight off long term, that on the way down you learn how to pull out those moments of pride. And the other-

Kathy:

I got something to say.

Corinne:

Go ahead.

Kathy:

Go ahead. To me this is pivotal, okay? Because I grew up with a father, who I love dearly, who told me repeatedly that one “oh shit” erases a hundred “atta boys”. I wrote that down. That’s how I was raised. And I think a lot of people in my generation were raised with that mentality and we carry that forward into our weight loss. That one “oh shit” moment, one binge, one overeat means we’re terrible people, rather than using that information like your poster did to go back and really look at what happened and notice what happened. And I think that’s some of the work that we do inside the membership that is so pivotal when it comes to making mistakes and learning from them and being okay with that because one “oh shit” moment does not erase a hundred “atta boys”. Right?

Corinne:

No. And it’s one of the things that I always talk to a lot of our women who had a traumatic experience in their past with a human. Somebody raped them, abused them, big T trauma stuff, and rightly so, their brain’s trying to protect them. So it makes this association that humans are dangerous. We have to have our guard up all the time and stuff. And when I always ask them this question about, all right… Because they’re cutting out. People who love them, they’re always getting coached on, I have a hard time connecting with this person, blah, blah, blah. And they know that it’s them. It’s like these people are wanting to love me so hard. And for some reason I can’t let it in. And I always have them do an exercise where they have to tell me how many humans hurt them so bad that it changed the trajectory of their life? And most… I’ve had one person say 20, but no more than 20.

Corinne:

And then when I have them reverse the exercise and talk about how many people in your life have been so kind to you that it changed things for you? They all… It’s real easy for them. They’re like, “Well, there’s been all these incidences with teachers and best friends in school.” When you really think about the totality of the people that you’ve been surrounded with in your life, most of us have had… I think about… There’s a girl I went to school with back in the day when I was in elementary school. Her name was Christie Hunter. And I haven’t thought about her in years, but… And she has no idea. I’m sure she doesn’t even listen to my podcast. But she was such a good friend to me in school when no one else would be. And even that person, when I think about my life, I can go through and pick out people who, maybe I only knew them for a few days, but I still remember them and the impact that they had on me and it changed how I think and how I trust and whatnot.

Corinne:

People always have way more good people than they ever have bad people. But we build walls to keep out the bad. And when we build walls, we also keep out the good. And so you just have to watch that in your brain, that it wants to over index something that feels harmful when that’s a mistake. When it’s an overeat, when it’s a binge, it makes it so much bigger than what it is. I read this on Instagram the other day. Everybody knows that if you go to the gym one day, let’s say you and I go to the gym, Kathy, and one day you and I work out. You would not wake up the next day and be like, where’s all my muscles? What happened? I feel short changed. But we’ll have one overeat, and we’ll be like, oh God, I’ve gone back to ground zero.

Corinne:

We’ll make one overeat so enormous as if that can erase two weeks of work. No, it can’t unless you allow it to. So that’s a good point. Let me move to this next section. I’m going to reread a little bit of it because it all goes together. She was talking about slow progress of weight loss. Well, what I deem as slow. I have been working on staying positive and focusing on all the positive changes I’ve made. However, in the back of my mind, I’ve been allowing the scale to fuck with me and not journaling or discussing it with anyone. I have been feeling like I still weigh over 300 pounds. I should be losing more than I am. I got on the scale and saw it up a pound this morning. And I was pissed. I could list all the things I feel like I have been doing, but the truth is I let all this get to me.

Corinne:

I acted like a titty baby and said, fuck it, and ate multiple times. I got up from my work desk and went to the closet and grabbed food and ate it. So one of the things that… There’s a couple things here that I want to address. The first one is a lot of our members told her she should take the Conquering the Scale course. So I created a whole course around the scale because it’s amazing to me how much misinformation is still out there about the way our weight loss happens. It’s no wonder all of y’all fucked feel up in your head and think you should be losing way more weight than you are. I promise all of you, the standard in weight loss is still 0.5 to two pounds per week, but two pounds per week is not better. It’s just two pounds. I have had so many people lose so much weight in No BS and every time somebody says, I lost 20 pounds. I lost 50. I’ve lost a hundred. I’ve lost 150.

Corinne:

I don’t give a fuck what their number is when they get to goal. If they ever post their chart, it’s always up and downs because that’s just how weight works. It’s not going to be going down every single week, especially every day. It’s supposed to zigzag a lot if you’re weighing daily. And their fucking average is usually about a pound a week. The other thing that fucks with our mind, especially if you have more than a hundred pounds to lose, is bullshit TV shows that trail people doing extreme dieting and exercise. Yeah, they lose a lot of weight because they’re doing something super extreme, and you’re like, oh, that’d be great. I would love it if I could just… I’d do anything if I could just lose a lot of weight. No. You could set up something extreme right now if you wanted to, but you ain’t choose it for a reason.

Corinne:

Let me just tell you what happens with the feelings of… Let’s say you’re losing a lot of weight and you’re feeling like, oh my God, this is working or whatever it is that you’re thinking, that’s why you’ll be excited. But you’re also going to have the duality of emotion. Every meal feels like it ain’t enough. Every time somebody wants to take you out to eat, you’re like, I can’t. You’re going to feel all the other bullshit on the other side. So don’t fake yourself into thinking that if you were losing weight faster, that it would all be perfect thoughts and feelings. You would be trading it in for a lot of willpower, a lot of sitting around being extremely hungry, pushing yourself to exhaustion, wishing this part was over, dreading going to the gym. There’s plenty of bullshit that comes along with those extreme diets. And they fool us into thinking that five pounds a week is normal. I don’t give a fuck if you weigh 300, 400 pounds.

Corinne:

You’re going to average, anyway. But this is the trick. All you need to do. Nobody wants to lose five pounds a week. Here’s what you really want. If I was losing whatever I think is a good amount each week, I would be thinking and feeling, that’s what you’re wanting. You’re wanting the thoughts and the feelings that you would attribute to faster weight loss. You do not need to restrict and do unhealthy things to create those thoughts and feelings. If you want to feel like this is working, then when you finish a meal and you don’t eat past enough, you need to tell yourself in that moment, this is working. This is me making sure weight loss happens. When you get on the scale and you’re down a half a pound, you have to tell yourself, this is working, instead of, I wish it was lower, because then you suck the joy.

Corinne:

You suck the pride right out of your process. And then if all you do is act like a Eeyore through your entire process of weight loss, you won’t make it to the end. If you’re desperate to feel good at the end, let’s work together on figuring out how to be proud now, how to be excited today. How to feel peace in your body, how to trust yourself, how to have confidence in your decisions. Because the person who is doing that all the way down, they don’t have a reason to keep overeating. And you have to learn that. But people tell me all the time, well, I can’t be proud at 300 pounds of my body.

Corinne:

Well, if you can’t be proud, can you at least stop beating it apart? Can we level up to, I no longer talk to myself like an asshole? Or can we at least get to the point to where it’s like, I may not be proud of my body today, but what can I do for myself that tomorrow I will wake up proud of how I showed up for me? Pride doesn’t have to just come in the body. If you want to feel pretty and you don’t feel pretty at your size and you just can’t get there. And I get it. It was hard for me to feel pretty when I was 250. Not because I wasn’t, but because society taught me that I wasn’t, and I believed it. I just believed what society told me all the time about bodies. But what I could feel is I could feel pretty about how I showed up in the world.

Corinne:

I could feel kind. There was a thousand things that I could start feeling to bridge myself there. And I will tell you one thing that helped me to start feeling better about me was when I thought that I looked terrible, I did dress terribly. I wore Chris’s clothes. This was before Chris was a man of fashion. I would just like everybody to know. Y’all don’t know the old Chris Crabtree. He was not exactly as stylish as he is these days. All of my friends, Kathy knows, the… What do you call it? The habit he has of making sure that he has good shoes… He’s got 12 pairs of shoes to match all of his bathing suits, all of his going-out outfits. He’s got… That man cracks me up.

Kathy:

I was noticing his shoes at the meeting we had a few weeks ago. He came in with these jeans on and this great looking shirt and these red shoes. And I was like, dang, these are cool.

Corinne:

Red suede [inaudible 00:33:14]-

Kathy:

Yes. Oh my gosh. Yeah. Yeah. He was styling. He sure was. And I bet he used all the product on his hair. He probably spent some time getting ready to [inaudible 00:33:24]-

Corinne:

All three of his hairs, y’all. All three of them. He’s got more hair product than I do half the time. What we do in Crabtree. But we digress.

Kathy:

That’s right.

Corinne:

But the thing is like, I used to wear his clothes, because it was so ashamed of my body. So I would wear clothes that… I didn’t want to go shopping because if I went shopping, it triggered me to be so ashamed of my body. And I finally realized, all right, I’m going to need to get something to wear that makes me feel better than just wearing my husband’s clothes. It didn’t mean that I was going to buy something and just automatically feel amazing about myself. But I looked for stuff that was like, all right, this feels a little better than what I’ve been choosing. It just kind of keeps going back to that duality of emotion. You’re going to feel both sides. Just work with yourself. Give yourself the option to feel both sides. I think what makes me so sad is some of you are… You only allow yourself to feel the bad side as if you’re not deserving of anything else until you lose weight.

Corinne:

And it’s just not true. Until we can rewire a lot of that other stuff, let’s just at least have… I’d rather, you have both playing at the same time than only one. And I tell my No BS women every week on Sunday when I’m coaching, I get that your brain says that stuff. We’ve talked a thousand times that that’s just shit your brain thinks. But here’s what I’m interested in. What do you want to be thinking? And are you willing to put that thought in as many times as necessary until it automatically comes up along with the other one? Because for a long time, y’all are going to have both thoughts going through your head. Eventually your identity shifts, but please don’t quit trying to change how you think just because your old thoughts keep coming back. Anything else you want to add?

Kathy:

This is just fascinating because it’s some of the work that I do with my own coach, this duality of emotions, and noticing that the big thing with her is just for me to notice when my habit brain offers me some of that old thinking. And the other thing is, you don’t have to wait to be proud like you were saying. You don’t have to wait until you reach goal, until you do something big, until you avert a binge, you can be proud in the little itty bittiest things during the day. I can be proud because I showed up dressed for this podcast recording. Corinne can be proud because she’s learning how to use her new glasses. Whatever it is, it can be the tiniest things. That’s how you begin practicing pride so that when you do hit goal, your brain’s not, well, it took too long, or you didn’t move fast enough, or what do you mean you hit goal? When you practice pride on the way down, it automatically shows up in places that you don’t expect. I think that’s the big thing.

Corinne:

So for all of the No BS women, since you’re going to be getting this video from me and Kathy, here’s a couple things I want to give you advice to do. Number one is if binging is something that’s going on for you, inside the membership, we have two things that you can do. Number one is you can take the Trusting your Body course. So once you finish the No BS Weight Loss course, jump on over into the Trusting your Body course. It was developed by my best friend who is also a binge eater and she gives you a lot of tools for calming your nervous system down. We have meditations in there. But we also just talk about a lot of… How we got to the point to where we don’t trust our body and reestablishing that piece is very comforting so that you can start working on the binging.

Corinne:

The other thing that you can do is you can go to the video replays and just type in the word binge. We have lots of coaching calls where people have been coached who binge, like, I am a binge eater, I’ve had a binge, I’d like to quit binging, I’ve got shame around Bing. We have coached so many times on this. I think often just listening to those calls and hearing that this is a very common thing. This is not something to be ashamed of. You are not alone in this. Lots of women do this.

Corinne:

And one of the things that we work on so hard inside of No BS is we want to normalize it. I know you don’t want to keep doing it and stuff, but here’s what we can do. We can quit making it mean that something is morally corrupt about you. And I watch a lot of binge just feel so hopeless, so alone and so ashamed and you don’t need to. That’s just not needed. What you can do is you can feel open to new ideas about it, feel compassion for yourself that at some point in the world, you associated a very uncomfortable emotion with eating food to solve it.

Corinne:

That’s all that’s probably happened. And that’s okay, because if you could make that association, that means that as an adult, we can teach your brain how to associate something better for you to solve for those things now. And then the last thing is I would advise any of our members who are still… If you are trying to weigh every day and it’s a fuck fest in your brain. If you think you should be losing weight faster. If you don’t understand why the scale goes up and down. For all those things, please take the Conquering the Scale course and do all the worksheets that go along with it because we really need to redefine the relationship with the scale. There’s nothing wrong with weighing in. The problem with the scale is that it’s a lagging indicator of your behaviors. We have this association that if I do good today, tomorrow I should see a payoff on the scale. And that’s not how it works. Your body is full of chemistry and physiology and all kinds of science. It just isn’t going to work that way.

Corinne:

You’re hedging all of your… Like, my validation, who I am as a person, by thinking about your body in the wrong way. And that’s a losing battle every single time. And so inside Conquering the Scale, I go into all of that. I go into how to use the scale, what’s a stall and a plateau. What’s the difference? All that is uncovered in that course. So all right, everybody. That is it for this week. I hope you enjoyed it. I hope you got a little sneaky peeky inside of how we do No BS, and for all my members, again, we will drop this video in. Kathy, do you think you can get it into Facebook today?

Kathy:

Yeah. I’ll take care of getting it. I want to shout out the poster. I know we said we weren’t going to use her name.

Corinne:

I don’t want to use her name.

Kathy:

Right. And that’s okay. Well, we’ll link it and make sure she hears this. She was so brave and so inspirational to make this post in our group because that showed how much work she’s doing and how open she is to community support and to love from the members. And then we had all these members come in and love her and support her. It’s just a beautiful, beautiful thing to see. So I wanted to shout her out and thank her for being so vulnerable and inspirational.

Corinne:

And just for all of you, if you ever join No BS and you’re like, oh, I would never be comfortable posting in the Facebook group. That’s fine. A lot of our members, they’ll come in and they’ve been a member for over a year and they’ve lost a bunch of weight. And then one day they’ll finally make a post and just say, I’ve just been reading and getting so many tips and so much inspiration from all of you. I just finally had to come in and say like I lost 40 pounds. And I just want to thank everyone. But it’s not required to be posting, but it’s so helpful. We have so many people who post every single day about their wins, their struggles, their successes, things that are working for them. It’s one of those things where you can either come in and you can be all in, I want to run my mouth, I want to type all the things, or you can be like, I just want to read some shit. That’s all I want to do. You will fit in with us. All right. Y’all have a good one. Bye, Y’all.

Corinne:

Thank you so much for listening today. Make sure you head on over to NoBSFreeCourse.com and sign up for my free weight loss training on what you need to know to start losing your weight right now. You’ll also find lots of notes and resources from our past podcast, Help you Lose your Weight without All the Bullshit Diet Advice. I’ll see you next week.

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I'm Corinne Crabtree

Corinne Crabtree, top-rated podcaster, has helped millions of women lose weight by blending common-sense methods with behavior-based psychology.

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